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Gut Wrenching: Gabriel x Reader

Something was wrong. You could feel it. The gut wrenching, world falling apart feeling. You couldn't shake it.

"We'll meet you in a week." Sam had said.

"Just a week, ok? No later, I promise." Dean had said.

Now here you were, waiting where you were supposed to meet. You never wanted to leave them in the first place, but you had to visit your mom. She was sick and in the hospital.

She was doing ok now, and for that you were thankful.

But now, you were worried.

"Come on, Sam." You muttered, dialing him again. When it went to voicemail, you had to stop yourself from throwing the phone across the room.

So you tried Dean again. For the tenth time, no answer.

"Damn it!" You yelled, kicking the wall.

"Ah, shit!" You shrieked as your toe throbbed.

Worst of all, he wasn't coming. You'd called him dozens of times. Usual he came the first time you called.

He should have. Especially because he knew you'd been to see your mother. He'd want to know how it want. He said to call him as soon as you got back.

"Come on, Gabriel. I need you to come!" You pleaded into the air. No response.

You were starting to hyperventilate now.

"Oh god." You said slipping to the floor.

You were having a panic attack. You used to have them all the time, until you met Gabe. He helped you chase them away.

But there was no one here now. No one to stop the darkness from coming and swallowing you whole. The thought that someone might have been hurt gnawed at your stomach as you sat, crouched on the floor.

You brought your knees up to your chest and hugged them, rocking yourself back and forth like Gabe taught you.

"If you ever have a panic attack and I'm not there, just do this." He would say.

"Do this and pretend I'm right there, holding you and rocking you to sleep." Then he would kiss you and tell you he loved you. That he would never let anyone hurt you because you meant too much to him.

But he wasn't here now. No one was, and you still couldn't shake the terrible feeling. You gnawed on your fingernail and you rocked back and forth, your attack slowly subsiding, your breathing going back to normal.

You were still rocking when you heard the front door open. You jumped up.

"Thank god! I was so worried! Gabe wouldn't come when I called. He's with you guys rig-" You stopped as you saw Dean and Sam walk in. The faces they made stopped you cold.

"What?" You asked, a thump in your throat.

"(Y/N)...." Sam started, reaching his arms out.

"Don't touch me!" You yelled.

"Where is Gabriel?"

"We ran into trouble. We had to stop at a-" Dean started. But you weren't having that.

"No! Tell me where he is!"

"He didn't make it. Lucifer had an angel blade........" Sam said, trailing off.

For a second, you stopped breathing.

Then you screamed. You screamed and you screamed.

Sam and Dean both rushed forward. They both tried to quiet you down, whispering words of comfort.

It wasn't working.

You screamed until you lost your voice. Then you just slumped to the floor and sobbed.

"I was just waiting for him. I was calling him and he was dying." You cried, tears streaming down your face.

Suddenly you were angry. You stood up, pushing the boys away from you.

"Why didn't you protect him?" You yelled.

"We tried but-"

You cut Sam off.

"No! If you really did, he'd still be here!" Your fists were clenched, and your nails dug into your palms.

"There was nothing we could do!" Dean argued.

"You guys never liked him! And bows he's dead. Are you happy now? I'm all alone now!" You screamed.

"Are you happy now?!" You screamed again before falling back to the floor.

You wrapped your arms around your knees. You closed your eyes and thought about Gabriel. Your Gabriel. Gone.

You were all alone now.