Long Away

Chapter 28

The day of New Years Eve came, and much to Ben's dismay, he had both Freddie and Brian's blessings to perform with the band. If he was being completely honest with himself, his biggest issue wasn't even that he would be messing with the timeline with his presence on stage - he had done that so much it probably didn't matter anymore - but he had a serious case of stage fright.

While the others were setting up Roger's drum set at the venue, a pub in downtown London that would fit approximately too many spectators, Ben nervously walked up and down the room.
"Ben, could you please try to calm down a little? You're a bit distracting," Brian pleaded.
"Sorry," Ben mumbled. He sat down at the edge of the drum risers, quietly tapping his foot.

Deaky came to join him when his help wasn't needed anymore.
"You look nervous," he pointed out the obvious.
"Yeah, I am. This is so bizarre. I really don't understand why Freddie even wants me here."
Deaky nodded understandingly.
"I can relate."
Ben frowned, bewildered.
"Really? How come? You're such an amazing bassist."
The boy next to him smiled shyly.
"Thank you. But I wasn't always as good as I am now. And I've played in a couple of different bands already. Nobody starts out with any clue of what they're doing." He laughed.

"Thanks, mate. That actually made me feel a little better," Ben said.
Deaky put a hand on his shoulder.
"I'm sure you'll do great."
"Of course he will." Roger appeared behind them and wrapped his arms around Ben, before flopping down on his free side.
"Getting jealous already?", Ben teased him. Roger pulled him closer.
"Of course I am."
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to," Deaky stammered. Roger laughed.
"Don't worry, kid. We're just joking."

"You better get used to that, Deaky. They think they're very funny," Brian warned him.
"Truly a foolish thing to think, considering I am the funniest person out of all of us," Freddie threw the meek rest of his humbleness over board. Brian sighed.

In the late afternoon the pub opened, a couple of hours before their performance was supposed to begin. The five men sat down at a table close to the bar, and Brian offered to pay for their first round of drinks. Among the first guests were Clare and Mary, who both joined them soon after.

They chatted and joked and laughed enough for Ben to loosen up and forget about the scariness of the upcoming gig. The women shared untold stories about Roger and Brian that even Ben had never heard before. Mary told them about her first few dates with Brian and how shy and dorky he was. He didn't try to stop her, but at the mention of the overly cheesy poem he had written to confess his feelings for her, he took a few large gulps of his drink.

"I memorized every word of it," Mary said. Roger and Freddie exchanged a mischievous grin.
"Oh really? Why don't you tell us, darling," Freddie suggested. Brian hid his face in his hands.
"Please no. That was not my best work." Mary giggled.
"I thought it was cute, honey."
Brian let out a deep sigh.
"Fine."
Mary took a sip from her glass before reciting the lines her boyfriend had written for her.

"You are a poem
I put into words.
So much gets lost in translation.
Like the sparkle in your eyes,
the sunbeams radiating from your smile.
You’re like white flowers in the light
of a warm spring day.
I could get lost in you.
In fact
I might already be,
oh Mary."

Roger burst out laughing. Ben lightly elbowed him in the side.
"You should take some notes," he said.
"You mean on how not to write a poem?", Roger laughed.
"Do better then," Brian pouted.
"Okay, I will."
"In my defense, I was drunk when I wrote it," Brian added.
"I don't think it's bad," Ben said.
"What's it called?"
"Just 'Poem'," Brian said.
"Oh wow, how creative," Roger teased.

"As much as I hate to interrupt this conversation, we should be getting on stage now," Freddie said after taking a look at the time.
"Oh boy." Ben emptied the glass in front of him.
"Don't worry, it'll be fun. I know you got this." Roger smiled reassuringly at his boyfriend. Ben took his hand.
"Thanks, sweetie."

Ben followed the others onto the stage and grabbed his guitar. As he turned on his amp, he quickly tuned down the volume when he thought that nobody was paying attention to him. When he looked up, he met Brian's gaze, but to his relief he just gave him a subtle nod and pretended not to have seen anything.

Freddie stepped forward to speak into the microphone.
"Hello all you beautiful people. We are Queen, and we are here to entertain you tonight. This is our first time on stage together. If you enjoy our performance, feel free to cheer. If you don't... also feel free to cheer."

A few people laughed at his joke. Meanwhile Ben felt the anxiety from earlier beginning to creep in again. He tightened his grip on the guitar and tried to focus on just Clare and Mary, who were already following Freddie's orders, rather than the rest of the crowd and their mostly skeptical looks.

Ben swallowed when Roger began to play. He positioned his hands, waiting for his cue. And before he could fully process what was happening, he was playing as a part of the most legendary band he had ever known. This time he made no mistakes, the adrenaline was coursing through him, and he strummed away like this was what he was born to do. He had a blast.

So much so that at first he didn't even notice the odd sensation in the back of his head, or the high pitched beeping sound mixing with the song they were playing. Then, suddenly, the pain hit him like an explosion. It was as if hundreds of knives were cutting through his entire body. His vision went blank and the air was drained from his lungs. He felt himself falling, hitting his head hard on something where moments ago there was nothing. The music stopped, was replaced by Roger screaming his name, then silence.

Ben couldn't tell how much time had passed when the strange noise came back. He tried to understand what was going on, but any thoughts immediately slipped his mind before he could fully grasp them. At first there was nothing but that sound, rhythmically beeping in the void. Then a bright light above him. A voice coming from the same direction.
"Ben? Ben, I'm here."
A faint memory sparked up at the soothing tone. It was the same voice he had heard weeks ago, thinking he was hallucinating. But this time, he remembered the person it belonged to. It was Gwilym.

***

Hey guys! Another early chapter since I won't be able to upload when I usually would. I was really excited for this chapter for a long time, so I hope you liked it! See ya next time,

Tay