'I go wherever you go, to win your heart Princess of Monaco.' - MKTO, Monaco
~
„I'm not opening that door again."
„Don't be afraid, Fi. I know you didn't forget how to open one. It works the same it ever has."
Fiona couldn't understand how he was still joking in a situation like that. Surely he must've realized by now, that she wasn't in the mood for it.
„Pierre, you know you're not funny right now. What the hell were you thinking?"
It was meant to come out as a question but at the same time it wasn't. Right now she was furious with him but also felt helpless. Why would he throw her into the cold water like that. She couldn't understand it.
„You know he can probably hear you, right?" He stated but Fiona didn't answer and just rolled her eyes instead. She was getting impatient with him. Rightly so, she thought.
Pierre must've come to the same conclusion, as he let out a sigh and finally gave her an answer to her question.
„When you told me, that you were ready to hear him out I called him. And before you start telling me that I shouldn't have, I'm not sorry I did. You weren't going to tell him yourself. I stood on the sidelines while you two were dancing around each other for long enough. It's time you guys finally get this sorted out, so I gave it a little push."
She couldn't believe what she was hearing. It wasn't supposed to be like that. She was supposed to be prepared for this.
„So you told him to come here? I never said I was ready so soon. It was supposed to happen when I was back home. I wanted to be prepared for this."
„I didn't. That was all him, he was on the next flight out. And don't go asking why he would do that. You know why. Open that door, you'll be fine. I promise."
He was right. Rationally thinking she knew exactly why he'd done it. That was who he was. He put everything into the people that were important to him. That's how she had always known him. That's the kind of person she had always known him to be.
Lately though, the lines of rationality and irrationality got blurred. They went from a straight line to resembling a labyrinth. And she wasn't sure she knew who he really was anymore.
She really wanted to believe that he was still that person. She did, but the wall of protection that she had build up around herself didn't allow her to.
It had made her so adamant that she was wrong about him. Her thoughts went down a spiral of believing it more and more each day.
She couldn't get hurt again, but she also couldn't go on like this. She just had no clue how to do it. How to bring herself to let him in again.
„I can't," she spoke into her phone, her voice quiet. „I don't know how."
„Yes you can, Fi." He told her encouragingly „You're forgetting how strong you are and I wouldn't tell you to do this if I wasn't sure that this isn't going to hurt you. Remember the plane ride? You said you trusted me, so do that."
Yes, she remembered what flight he was talking about, but that was something else they needed to discuss on another occasion. She had to make sure they were both on the same page about what had happened on it. Right now though, she had other important matters to attend.
Ending the call, she put her phone into the back pocket of her black, slightly ripped jeans and took a step towards the door.
Reaching for the door knob, she halted for a second and looked through the peephole.
