Something Gained

Chapter One Hundred & Thirteen

We flew to Japan straight after Singapore, which gave us time to chill out. Michael, Jon, Lando, Dan and I toured Tokyo for a day before heading to Suzuka and getting settled in our hotel, it took my mind off of what I was hiding, but I had added guilt for doing so. I knew Daniel would be gutted, as would Lando, I had worked with him for so long now. I had worked with the whole team for so long, it would be so odd and I didn't know what I was going to do about it.

Sophie had gone home to England as she really wasn't well, so I was on week two of my PR duties. I hadn't spoken to anyone about the Mercedes thing, but Daniel clearly knew something was up as a I was quiet. After this race, we were heading to America. Well I was now going to England, as I had accepted the meeting invitation, but afterwards I was going to America. I was staying with Dan in LA, and then we were headed over to Texas.

I wasn't sleeping very well. I felt guilty, they had explained in the email about the meeting and what it was for and it was practically eating me up to keep it to myself. I didn't like it. Dan rolled over in bed and slung his arm around me and pulled me to him.

"You know when you don't sleep, I can't sleep" he mumbled quietly, his voice sounding sleepy. He ran his lips along my collarbone before placing a kiss on my shoulder and then working his way up to my neck. I didn't react much and he knew. "Something is up" he said as he sat up a little

"Nothing is"

"I have never kissed you and you've just laid there. You've been quiet and off, and even though you're with me all weekend, you're not actually there" Daniel said. I groaned "you keep hiding things"

"I'm not hiding things?" I told him, I was a bit annoyed but it was more with myself because I didn't actually know why I hadn't told him. I felt like I couldn't, because I was scared of what he might say or do.

"Lex" Daniel flicked the lamp on and sat back, putting his arm behind me and pulling me on his chest "just tell me what's going on bubs"

"I got a call last week, I've been headhunted" I said simply, although my heart was racing in my chest.

"Oh really? For what? Where is it?" Daniel asked, he sounded interested

"Mercedes. They want to have a meeting to be their director of communications" I told him. When I read the email I was aghast. It was another promotion, and the salary was double what I'm getting now, it'll be travelling around the world still, working with the F1 team and working with the drivers. I was confused by it, and I didn't know what to think.

"Mercedes?" Daniel asked

"Yeah..." I trailed off and stayed silent. Daniel didn't say anything else, he stayed silent and I didn't know what to think. "They asked for a meeting, I've accepted as I'm curious, but I don't know what to think"

"That's.." Daniel started speaking and I looked up at him. My heart pounding in my chest at what could possibly be going through his mind. But it was in that split second that I realised, no matter what I did in life, I would still be with him, I didn't need to work in the same area as him, be in the same company to be able to see him and make our relationship work, we lived together, and I would see him and my job in life was not dependant on him.

"I know you think about some things, but I don't even know what I'm going to do yet, I just want to see what goes on, but it's a step up, it furthers my career and it could be great-" I rambled but Daniel cut me off by putting his hand over my mouth

"Can I speak now?" He chuckled, I nodded and he removed his hand "Alex I hope it goes well, I hope the meeting is great, and I'm proud of you, you earned this. It's what you do, that's made this happen, for someone to come looking for you. Let's see where it takes you" he said. I was, for the second time in a short period, speechless. I honestly didn't expect him to say that, of course I had underestimated him.

"I thought you would be annoyed that you would think I wouldn't have time for you?" I asked

"Alex I've never been annoyed about that, you can always do as you please, I just get worried but it's nothing that should be stopping you from doing what you want to do" he smiled and i nuzzled into his neck and breathed him in.

"Thank you"

"Although you might want to tell Blake and Mike, they're worried about you" Daniel hummed softly as he rubbed his hand up and down my back

"I will.... although I don't want to make it a big thing. Plus I would have to speak to Zak and yeah..." I shrugged, I hadn't worked out all the logistics yet

"Focus on yourself, not about Zak or anyone else. Just you, when is the meeting?" He asked

"The 12th" I said

"So you're not coming to LA?" He asked

"I am, just will fly to England and then once I've had the meeting I will fly to LA" I said, I felt his attitude shift and it confused me

"You had this all worked out considering you hadn't told me until five minutes ago"

"I was going to tell you, I just didn't know how?" I sighed

"Do you ever think maybe you should just speak more? Trust me? Not assume you know what my reaction is going to be?" He quizzed, he pulled his arm out from underneath me. Okay this was a slight overreaction that I didn't expect and probably wasn't warranted.

"I do trust you, Dan, I just didn't want to worry you. And I didn't know how to even say it"

"Okay" he rolled his eyes as I looked at him before turning off the light and turning over to face away from me.

"Don't be like this" I said quietly, pulling on his shoulder

"Whatever Alex" I sighed and gave up. This was precisely the reaction I thought I was going to get. "You can go off and do your Mercedes job"

"You're being childish"

"I must be because you didn't think I was grown enough to be told"

"I literally got the call last week, it's not as if it was months ago and I had already got the job before telling you" I mumbled into the dark room

"Maybe it would be better for you to get it" he had a snarky tone behind his words and it touched a nerve. But I bit my tongue from snapping back horribly, choosing my words carefully.

"Then I hope to god I do" I rolled my eyes but he couldn't see me. I heard him tut and not reply so I left it and faced away from him. But I wasn't done. "By the way, this is exactly the reaction I was trying to avoid, about trust and not telling you things, this is why, because as much as you say you're good with it, you're not, because you're frightened of something they will never happen, and that's what the real problem is here" I said, I didn't get a response but I hoped he heard it, I didn't like sleeping on an argument but he hadn't replied to me so I couldn't do much else. I huffed and went to sleep.