Who Is It: Love's Nightmare: Book 2 (COMPLETED)

29. Hellfire

Joh'vonnie's Point of View:

"Okay Joh'vonnie you can work your way through this....it's just a test and it's still processing." I say as I pace back and forth in the bathroom. I was still at Jermaine's house, my husband Morris went house hunting with Jermaine.

With everything that could potentially unfold with the Cordelanos and the Corven Cartel. Michael thought it would be smarter if my family and I moved closer to the family. I won't lie this is what I always wanted. To be apart of my siblings and father's life.

This is everything I had worked towards after Matthew almost derailed me. What is wrong with men trying to take away the things I desired in my life. For instance this threat from Bernard. I wanted to know what leg he thought he could stand on. I reached out to our old mutual friend Archie.

Archie tells me that Bernard has came into some high profile job that is paying really well. I knew Bernard he never did anything legitimately. If he was apart of a new crowd my senses are telling me it is going to be a problem for me and my family. Michael told me the family has a list of enemies. Who to say Bernard hasn't met with the Cordelanos.

His mistress was an Italian waitress from our city of San Diego. My mother never left hoping Joseph would come back. She said she met him while he was vacationing in the city. Thoughts of my father swirled my mind. He still hasn't awoken from the coma.

Doctors work around the clock to make sure that we have a glimmer of hope. But things are very up in the air. I remember how my dad would spend weekends and one time he spent a whole week with me. My mother said her relationship with Joseph quickly fizzled out when mom told him she was pregnant.

He never abandoned me financially. Mom and I never had to struggle for anything other than attention and presence from Daddy. I was ten years old when he finally told me about my brothers and sisters as well as his wife. It was his answer to why he was hardly ever around. My issues with men stemmed from that moment.

I went out looking for something I thought I didn't have and that was Daddy's love. Behest to me he did love me very much but he made a mistake. One he didn't know how to fixed. It took me until I was scarred from my ex-husband and the death of my mother to even try and face the fact that I was still that sad little girl missing her father.

I don't blame Joseph anymore like I used to. A bulk of my trauma are from my own bad decisions and mistakes. One decision that wasn't a mistake was my daughter. I gave her everything of me even when her father was unable to.

My daughter was three months old crying her head off while her father smacked me around and raped me. He wanted sex and I was just done healing but I didn't feel good about myself. Besides who would want to sleep with a man who was cheating on them and abusing them?

I told him no and met my fate that day. Yasmine cried for thirty minutes while I endured that abused. I had to take her to the hospital because her cries made her have slight complications. That day I promised not to take his shit no more.

So when he went out to be with his mistress. I trained with my mentor Paul Cragen. He was an expert marksman who lived three doors down from me. He took pity on me and taught me everything I know. In exchange he needed for me to help him as he was dying.

After three months of training and enduring Bernard's abuse I built a tough shell and cold exterior. Then it happened, one day he went to try and hit me and I pulled out the .45 caliber that I had got earlier that week. I pointed it at him as he laughed at me.

He thought I was playing games and he threatened to hit me harder. He said all that did was turn him on and he asked me if I ever killed anyone like he did. I knew he was lying Bernard never killed anyone. He loved to play mind games and he used to be good at it before I met Paul.