𝐇𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 - 𝐑𝐚𝐲 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 - 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃!

Chapter Fifty-Two - Flashbacks

I'm in the library with Susan, I'm watching her do my homework to make sure she doesn't make any mistakes that could get me in trouble. While doing so I get distracted with my thoughts and memories. Eventually I get stuck with one... how I got the mark...

F L A S H B A C K

     The cold and darkness of the room engulfs me and the countless others in here with me. We're all gathered around a long dining table with a snake laying in the middle. I really don't why the snake had to be here, maybe just because Voldemort wants it here. The room is silent except for the hissing of the snake who I can't remember the name of, and the footsteps of Voldemort entering the room. I watch as he walks to the head of the table and sits down. The atmosphere thickens even more.

     "So, this is your child, Maria?" Voldemort questions my mother. His tone holds doubt as he looks me up and down.

     "Yes, this is Y/n. She's my daughter," She answers him in confidence. "She's the one who was in the Triwizard tournament last year." I watch between the two of them anxiously, scared of what Voldemort may do.

     "Are you sure she can contribute much? She's just a child, she can't really do much." I frown slightly at this, I don't like my abilities being underestimated.

     "She has connections on how to get inside Hogwarts and she can give us inside information." I nod in agreement to her. I may not exactly want this, but it's for the best.

     "Fine then. She can be of some use."

F L A S H B A C K O V E R

     Shaking my head, I look over at Susan to see her staring intensely at the piece of parchment she's writing on. What in Merlin is she even working on? She just took all the stuff from my hands and started working on it. I obviously wasn't bothered to pay attention to what she wanted to work on with my homework.

     "What are you even working on?" I question her as she fervently writes on the parchment, not looking up to pay attention to me.

     "I'm doing your Astronomy homework. You hate it and struggle with it so I want to knock it off first and get it over and done with in case you change your mind and take your homework off of me." She answers hurriedly. I smile slightly in gratitude. She knows what subjects I struggle with. Although almost everyone knows I struggle with Astronomy at this point, it's still kind of her. How she manages to be kind enough to do this for me, I don't know.

     Around eight minutes pass and I get bored, seeing as I have nothing to do.

     "If you're bored you don't have to stay." Susan says, seeming to read my mind.

     "Are you sure?" She nods and I stand up from my seat.

     "I'll give the homework back to you tomorrow." Susan informs me.

     "Alright. Again, thank you." I thank her before walking off to find something to do. As I walk through the hollow halls, I decide to go to the Quidditch Pitch since there is rarely anyone there when it isn't practice time. I can fly around for a bit. I feel an incandescent love for Quidditch. It always feels like I'm going on an adventure of sorts whenever I fly around or play Quidditch. I'm very good at Quidditch, at least that's what I'd like to believe anyways.

     After going to my dorm to get my broom and putting the rest of my stuff away, I arrive at the Quidditch pitch. I mount my broom and kick off into the sky. I start doing laps around the pitch to blow off some steam and reflect. I always want to practice and put in the effort to do well in Quidditch. Flint always encourages us to practice whenever we have free time, but we also have to study.

     No one ever talks about how isolating studying and practicing is. You have to sacrifice friendships to squeeze everything in, and you feel lonely most of the time. What I do to myself is something clandestine, like meeting a common enemy nobody else can know I'm familiar with. Like flowers, I am delicate. Not physically though, I am emotionally and mentally. I am easily shattered by people's words and actions. That sounds pathetic, and I wish it wasn't true. I relate more to a flower than I actually should. I feel the need to dress myself up and cover myself with beauty so people are attracted to me. I want to cover my bodis up with beauty so people don't notice my flaws and insecurities. Telling anyone about this is a definite no. Speaking about it makes my heart feel as if it's going to shatter into pieces before I get even the slightest bit in depth of it.

     This was always an effect of me trying to talk about how I feel. That's why I've decided to stop talking about it, especially with my mother. Whenever I want to express my feelings or any opinion I have whatsoever she completely tarnishes and dismisses what I say. I normally got affected by what she did when I was younger, but in recent years, what she said didn't affect me as much. Maybe because she was around less.

     Maybe if I spent less time with her in my childhood, I wouldn't feel this way. Whatever, it's not like I can change the past anyhow. I should probably stop dwelling on this now. I'm going to become "emo" like how Emma would phrase it. Sighing, I slow down my broom and go down to the ground. I hop off and look around to make sure no one is around me. I need to make sure that people I'm trying to avoid aren't near me. But a small part inside me hopes to run into Emma.

     "Y/n! There you are! I was looking for you." It looks as if luck is on my side today. A small smile rises to my face as I turn to face her.

     "Hello Emma. Can I help you?" I ask her. Telling Emma some of what I'm going through was relieving.

     "I told them to stay away from you! They shouldn't be talking to you now." She exclaims happily.

     "Thank you Emma. I really appreciate this."

     "Of course, anytime. You are my friend after all." I hug her for a slight bit before letting her go.

     "Thank you. I should go now." I wave goodbye to her before walking off towards my dorm.

Maybe things will turn out alright

Chapter Fifty-Two End