(Mikey POV, !!harsh anxiety, suicidal/SH ideals!!)
"I don't exactly know why I use it as motivation, it just gave me a sense of 'Keep trying and you can' mindset." I said, "Well, I'm still sorry I went through your phone without asking. But please, don't use the song for that purpose, it worries us." Casey says, "I'll try" I tell back, we both know the song isn't getting out of my playlist, but I am gonna try to stop using it as motivation.
It drives me kinda insane, that the thought of my own death is funny to me. It's not supposed to be funny at all, yet it is. I find another song that isn't so driven to me but still gives me a 'Keep going, you'll get there eventually' feel, I need to stop digging the hole, it's just getting deeper. The way I've dug myself into this pit is to a point where I don't think I can get out of it. I don't remember much of this song, but all I know is that it's from a musical. I connect my phone to my speakers and play it aloud. I start to remember the words and sing along, for some reason I start to cry without fully noticing. I don't know why I relate to so many songs like this, but I do.
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Michael in the bathroom at a party
This is a heinous night
I wish I stayed at home instead
Watching cable porn
Or wish I offed myself instead
Wish I was never born
I'm just Michael
Who's a loner
So he must be a stoner
Rides a PT Cruiser
God, he's such a loser
Michael flying solo
Who you think that you know
Michael in the bathroom by himself
All by himself
All by himself
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And the thing is, I'm not alone, but I seriously need to be. I also think I need to be put in a mental ward.
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Unbearable Insanity
FanfictionMikey has not been as brutally honest as his older brothers think he has . . . His brothers and friends find out that Mikey has been dealing with mental instability alone one night while snooping around in his room, which is the only room in the hou...
