Sweetest Pain || Hawk Moskowitz

80 Things Fall Apart

Though she cried in the car, the gravity of her conversation with Hawk didn't really hit KT until she got home. It tore her to pieces.

She cried in Yasmine's arms for hours, her sister wiping away smears of mascara with tissues while trying to console her, but it was futile. She sobbed violently, her throat raw and sore, eyes red and puffy. Nothing made the pain go away. It was an earth shattering, despicable agony that felt unreal, unfathomable, completely and utterly undesirable. Her chest ached so much, it rivaled the pounding headache she had gotten from crying so hard.

The tears didn't stop until she fell asleep, finally exhausted after the emotional highs and lows of the day. They'd caught up to her, making it impossible for her to keep her swollen, tender eyes open. But before her eyes closed, all she thought was, I regret it.

When she stopped whimpering, Yasmine cleaned her face and tried to make the swelling go down with a cool rag. She was gentle and sweet, switching the tear-stained pillow for a fresh one before she tucked KT into bed and turned out the light.

She would have stayed, but needed to wind down after the hours away from home. She wanted to wash her face and refresh herself, destress and decompress from the complicated and downright awful end of the day they'd had. She needed to calm down before she did anything irrational, her own feelings ready to boil over after tending to sweet, caring KT for hours on end because she was suffering her first broken heart.

Once she'd done everything she could think of to relax, she laid in bed and stared at the ceiling, hands folded over her stomach. She was cross, but tried not to let it show because she was trying to convince herself she wasn't as upset as she was. However, that rarely ever worked out. Nearly impossible, really, because she knew that it wouldn't just go away. Her sister was hurt and she was angry that there was nothing she could do to fix it.

She fell asleep vexed.

When her alarm sounded in the morning, she almost turned over and went back to sleep, but the night's events haunted her as the ghost of her sister's freshly ended relationship lingered. She didn't hear a sound, so she got up to check on KT.

She cracked the door to her bedroom just enough to see her bed and saw KT fast asleep hugging one of her plushies tight against her chest. She looked peaceful as she slept, though it was a sight Yasmine knew wouldn't last long. So she closed the door quietly and went to get ready for the hard day ahead.

Yasmine
I need u. KT and Hawk broke up last night

Moon
Oh no is she ok??

Yasmine
No
She's totally heartbroken

Moon
What happened?

Yasmine
Tldr Hawk is an asshole and an idiot
Tell u more l8r

Moon
I'll b there in 30

~

When KT woke up, she wanted to believe that last night was just a terrible dream. However, when she checked her phone and there was no good morning text from Hawk, she knew the truth. It's really over.

The tears began to well in her eyes anew and she put her phone on the table facedown, unable to look at its empty messages inbox. Her body ached as if she'd just ran a 10k marathon, except she wasn't sweaty and exhilarated. No, she was heartbroken, weighed down to her bed by an invisible force. The sun shone into her bedroom, but the curtains were closed and everything felt unreal.

She still couldn't believe the amount of pain she was in. If she were asked to rate it on a scale of one to ten, it was a twenty. Her heart was in pieces, holding so much hurt and pumping it into her bloodstream. She felt it in her fingertips and toes; her headache dully and she briefly remembered Yasmine giving her some aspirin before she fell asleep.