Inhliziyo Yami Yopha: My Heart Bleeds

Chapter 18

ZANOTHANDO

She looks so peaceful as she snores lightly. You'd think the sounds of her snores would annoy me but I actually like it. Call me weird but this is the woman I have wanted for so long and now I finally get to be there for her. I can tell that she has the weight of the world on her shoulders.

If only she could share some of her problems with me then I would find a way to solve them for her, if I can that is. I don't think there's anything I wouldn't do to make her happy or at make less worried. And that was why when the opportunity to help her presented itself, I could not help but step in and do it.

Not that I want her to see me as a hero, but someone she can depend on in her time's of need instead. That is really all I want and maybe she will get to finally see just how much I love her. I haven't even told her how I feel about her because I'm sure she'll think it's way too soon for those words.

But I think that is bullshit because we don't get to choose how we feel and when to feel it. It just happens and it is different for every other person and, it would be crazy of us to put a time limit as to when love finds us. Those are my thoughts on the matter but of course, I can't expect other people to share the same thoughts as mine.

Nikiwe stirs a little in her sleep and rolls over to the other side of the bed before going back to snoring. I don't think I can ever get over the fact that I get to be in such close proximity to her. I'm glad that her douche bag ex boyfriend, Sfiso, acted out because now I get to have her all to myself.

I have been hiding in the shadows for so long because I didn't want to disturb what she had with him. More especially since I saw how happy she was with him back then. I met her two years ago I think, and that was at South Gate Mall. I had went there with my brother to do some shopping for a Braai we would be having later.

I was so reluctant on going with him but after a lot of persuasion, I gave in and acconpanied him. And I thank him for pushing for me to join him because I got to meet the woman of my dreams. We bumped into each other at a snack isle in one of the shops, and I was so pissed about it.

That was until I looked up and saw the woman who took my breath away. She immediately apologized after the incident but I couldn't even say a word, so I just stood there dumbfounded. I mean I wanted to say something but my mouth could not formulate the words I wanted to let out.

So there I was, looking at her walk away from me. I was about to approach her and ask what her name was but someone beat me to it. Her friend Cindy called out her name and that was how I got to search for her using only her name and body description. Dark chocolate skin; petite body and blonde short hair...not to mention short in height.

With that little information, I got to work and started searching for her as soon as we got back home with Khayalethu, my brother. I sent a message to one of my trusted guys and asked him to search for her using only what I had. By the end of that day, I had found out where she lived, who she lived with and every other thing I needed to know about her.

I was a happy man that day and I already had an idea of how I wanted to coincidentally meet with her. Everything was set and the plan was in motion but then, I saw her with that fool Sfiso and couldn't make a move on her. I was not scared of the boyfriend but I did respect her enough to see she was in a healthy relationship, her never ending smiles said it all.

With this, I decided to fall back and lurk around the shadows in case a chance presented itself. I once again, had one of my guys follow her around but not look suspicious. Just to ensure that she was safe at every moment and that nothing bad ever happened to her. Luckily, Nkunzi the guard, never had to step in and ruin my cahnces of always knowing where she was.

Yes, he was also nearby when her granny fell sick and needed to go to the hospital but thay would have ruined my plan. I am glad that granny survived thaf time and I'm hoping the same will happen now. Her going to that club with Cindy was a blessing in disguise because I got to finally have an excuse of how I met her even though it's not completely true.

Then a few months ago, I saw her at my club. I'm the owner of Envy Lounge and on the day she had went there, I was around. Sitting in the VIP making sure that nobody takes full notice of my presence so I can spy on my girl in peace. Nkunzi had already informed me that she'll be there and boy was I happy. I'd finally get the chance to approach her and stop hiding.

Then a stupid looking, light skinned cheeseboy showed up and ruined my plans. I'm not sure what he wanted from her so I was already on my feet when I saw him take too long while talking to her. I couldn't let anyone else have her when I finally got the chance to make her mine.

Relief set in when I saw Nikiwe walk past him after taking her drink and left him looking like a wet chicken. That act made me happy because I hoped she saw what I saw when I looked at him, a loser. But any other reason is okay with me as long as she didn't leave with him.

Fast forward, I got Cindy's help in "getting" her numbers and everything else was just easier from there. We got close and even got to spend the weekend together with no disturbances from other people. That was the weekend I thought I'd finally tell her how I felt but then I never found the perfect moment.

We bonded, but more like friends rather than lovers and we didn't get to even share the bed together. The only time we'd be together in bed was when she came into my room early in the morning because she ran out of sleep. I think that was just an excuse to be close to me but then again, I couldn't make a move based on assumptions.

By the end of the weekend, I didn't want her to leave but I knew that was just wishful thinking. She would never survive being away from her granny for longer than that and so I had to suck it up and act nonchalant about it. But Lord knows if I was given the chance, I'd keep her by my side 24/7 and officially make her mine.

That will have to wait though because now, her granny's health is on the line making her completely vulnerable. As a gentleman that I am, I refuse to take advantage of the state she is in. It would be very cruel and selfish of me to my needs first instead of her well-being.

When we got back from the hospital, I forced her to take a shower so she can relax and get some rest before we go back there. After the shower, she spent less than ten minutes in bed before she was snoring. I must add that she looks beautiful even in her sleep.

I borrowed her one of my T-shirts and sweatpants. This woman is able to make anything look great on her body because she looks like an angel. Now I don't know if it's the love in me talking or what, but she really can pull off anything she wears. I think that's why I'm attracted to her, because of her simplicity.

It has been hours since she fell asleep and I'm letting her rest because I know she'll want to leave as soon as she does. I haven't got a call from the hospital informing me about any news so I've decided to just get some sleep myself.

We are in my bedroom and she's asked that I don't leave her alone no matter what. I have no choice but to join her in bed and maybe get to squeeze in a cuddle or kiss...who knows. This might be the first and the last time I get to share a bed with her like this, so I want to make it count.

As soon as I get under the duvet, she moves again and I start to wonder if I've woken her up. I stay still for a second or two then turn to face her as I shut my eyes. She mumbles in her sleep and she throws her leg and arm over me, snuggling closer to me.

Her face is om the nape of my neck and her warm breath brushing over me. My skin breaks out into goosebumps as I start feeling a deep craving of her lips over mine. I'm sure that's the devil's work so I have to avoid temptation at all costs.

I let out a deep breath as I pull her even closer to me and drape one of my arms around her. Making sure to secure hee tightly in my embrace in case she decides to leave early in the morning without me. I'm a deep sleeper so I hope I get to hear if she escapes from my hold and makes a run for it, which I hope she doesn't.

Well Lord, here's to a long night ahead and I hope you keep my boner in check. Amen.

Sigh.

I hope Bra G heard my message where ever HE is.