CRYPTO: Infidelity (Book 1)

CHAPTER 90: FRAUD

As soon as I got home, I broke down in tears. That officer was dead because of me. I shouldn't have let Rockie have his gun. I should have had the cop's back. How could I think that my life was more valuable than his? He was a good cop. I was a criminal. A fraud. A dumb kid who was in way over his head. That cop probably had a family. I had nobody. Not even my girlfriend was mine.

I couldn't stand myself. Maybe Diesel was right about me after all. Maybe I did all of those horrible things to get back at God. Maybe I wasn't as good as I had thought. How could I let myself be so stupid as to try to get back at an imaginary Being? Revenge never solved anything. My parents taught me that. I should have known better.

Now I had to do the one thing I promised myself I would never do. I was being forced to join the cause that got my parents killed in the first place. The mafia wanted to use me the same way they used my uncle, and innocent police officers would have to pay for it. I couldn't even handle being slightly responsible for killing one officer. I couldn't kill thousands!

I couldn't participate in their plan. I wouldn't. They would have to kill me. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did such an awful thing. Just thinking about it made me sick to my stomach.

But what if they tortured me? Would I be able to hold my ground? What if they threatened to hurt Birdie? Diesel knew I loved her. I couldn't let that happen. I would have to kill myself. It was the only way out; the only way Birdie would be safe.

But what did she want to tell me? I had to know. It might have been important, but what? Did she want to stop seeing me? Was she going to break up with Rockie? Did she know valuable information about the mafia that could change everything? It was unlikely that she could change my fate, but I needed to know. After talking to her, I would probably have to end it. Hopefully, she wouldn't be too broken-hearted.

In the morning, I called out of work so I could get the talk with Birdie over with.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" I asked her when she came over.

"Well... There's no easy way to say this," she said.

"You're breaking up with me?" I guessed.

"No. I'm... I'm pregnant."

"Oh. That's... That's great!" I said.

"No, Crypto. It's not great," she told me.

"I thought you wanted kids."

"Yeah, but not like this! I don't even know whose it is."

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"It's too early to tell."

"No, I mean, you think it could be Rockie's?"

"Don't be so naive, Crypto. What did you think we've been doing? We live with each other."

"Does he know?" I asked. "That you're pregnant?"

"I haven't told him yet," she said.

"How do you think he'll handle it?"

"I don't know, but if he finds out it's yours, he'll probably kill us both."

"So what are you gonna do?"

"I have an ultrasound in four weeks. I should know then. If it looks like you, I'm gonna get an abortion."

"Wait. Hold on. You can't do that! It's my baby as well. Shouldn't I have a say?"

"Did you not hear the part when I said Rockie would kill us if he found out?" she asked.

"I will protect you. You know I will. Just don't kill our baby."

"It's a fetus, Crypto."

"A fetus is a baby, Birdie. You're just calling him a fetus so you don't feel bad about killing him."

"Him?"

"Or her."

"I think you mean it," she said. "It doesn't have a gender yet."

"Just because we don't know the gender yet, doesn't mean they don't have one."

"I'm not gonna argue with you about this. It's not your decision what I do with my body."

"It's not your body!" I exclaimed.

"How dare you!"

"Birdie, would you just listen-"

There was a knock at the door.