Beautiful

Waking

Andie POV

I feel a shooting pain in my abdomen, I feel achy and tired and my head is pounding. As I open my eyes the lights above me are blinding. It's takes me a while to adjust. I feel weight on both hands, I turn my head slightly to see Leah, asleep on my arm. I turn to the other side and see Chris also asleep. I gently lift my hands and run my fingers through his hair. He starts to wake, slowly looking up at me as I smile.
"Andie?"
"Hey" my voice so croaky "water please"

He grabs it quickly for me and helps me take a sip. Before he kisses my forehead, he sits on the bed and cups my cheeks.
"I've missed you so much"
"I missed you too"
Leah starts to wake up too, looking at me and I see the tears fall.
"Andie!"
"Hi" she hugs me closely, wincing she pulls away "I'm so sorry"
"It's ok"
"I'm going to get the doctor ok"
I nod and she leaves. Looking back at Chris, I see tears falling down his cheeks too.

"I'm okay chris"
"Andie, you nearly died and it's my fault"
"No it's not. It's my fault Chris"
He shakes his head "if I hadn't of said what I did you wouldn't have left and..."
I cup his cheek with my one hand "no okay. This was on me. I ran away and I knew it was dangerous but I still did it"
"I made you run Andie. I'm so sorry"
"It's okay" I bring his face closer to mine and leans our foreheads together.
"I love you Chris"
"I love you too Andie"

I pull him into a kiss and he happily receprocates. As well pull away I hear the doctor coming in.
"Hello miss peters, how are you feeling?"
"I'm okay. Just a bit sore"
"That's understandable, you were stabbed multiple times. We managed to stop the bleeding and repair the damage"
"Thank you"
"But Miss Peters, there was some damage we could not fix"
"What do you mean?"
"Due to the damage to your fallopian tubes and womb. It would be very difficult if not impossible for you to carry a child"

I shake my head and tears fall, chris wraps his arms around me and holds me close. The doctors offers his sincerest apologies and leaves. I can't help but sob into Chris's chest, being a mum was one of my biggest dreams. To carry my children in my own stomach and to feel them
Kick and move and now I won't ever get that feeling. Leah holds my hand and sobs with me, she knows how important this was to me.

"It's going to be okay Andie"
I don't say anything, I just cry and clutch onto him, I know now the future I want is not going to happen. Not with kids and probably not with Chris, he is not going to want to be with someone who can't have children. It's his dream to have kids and I can't give them to him. So I breath him in while I can, before my whole world decides to fall apart from beneath me.