A Coin Has Two Sides || Kaz Brekker x OC

17. No Protection

The sound of waves and the scent of sea salt calmed Winnie as much as possible.

Winnie had found herself at the docks. She wanted to get out of Ketterdam. She wanted to get away from Kaz Brekker.

She had only found herself this desperate to escape from a person once before. Her father. Her father that was probably still looking for her. Without Kaz's protection, she was almost certain it wouldn't take long before he got his hands on her and dragged her back to Ravka kicking and screaming where she knew no one would come and save her. Not anymore.

She was trying to think of a plan, but her mind was too clouded with rage that she couldn't think straight.

Kaz Brekker practically ran Ketterdam. If she were to stay here, he would find her. She had hoped her threat against him got through his thick skull and stayed there. If it did it would buy her enough time to get out of Ketterdam and lay low somewhere else.

She was strong now. She had her powers under control, for the most part. It would help her fend off anyone who tried to come for her even though the list was long.

Winnie looked down at the waves. They were calm at this time and were glimmering in the moonlight that shone down from the sky. A sky that contained no stars, not tonight.

Suddenly, tears started pouring from her eyes. She almost had no control over them. It was as if they had been locked in a cell for so long and now finally had been let free.

Disobedient bitch.

Weak.

Just a little girl.

Disappointment.

You're just like your father. 

Words, Winnie. They're just words. They can't hurt you.

But they did. Winnie had been injured by words more than any knife or bullet.

For some reason, the words Kaz spoke to her stung a little more and she knew why.

With her father, she had learned over the years that he was a monster, just a monster. She could drown out his words with the belief that he didn't have it in him to say anything else.

But with Kaz, it was different. He was a monster in his own right, but over the months she had known him, she had seen a different side to Kaz Brekker, one she knew not many people got to see.

A caring side, a light side.

And she had been foolish enough to believe that there was a reason he had shown that side to her.

Because he cared for her.

Idiot.

When Winnie had asked Kaz why he had asked to see her first, she had hoped he would take the opportunity to tell her that he cared.

Fool.

Instead, she was met with the worst possible outcome. An outright declaration of how little he valued her. That she meant nothing to him at all. That she was replaceable and worst of all, he wanted to replace her.

In that moment, his words had shattered the part of her that had been caring towards Kaz Brekker into pieces.

What remained was hatred, pure and simple.

Of course, she would miss Jesper and Inej dearly. Leaving them behind made everything all the much harder. She would miss Inej's perfect smile and the way she tried to teach her how to throw knives. She would miss Jesper's cheeky winks and bets on who could make Kaz roll his eyes the most in one sitting. She would miss the way they all spoke about their future dreams and hopes.