About You || Anakin Skywalker x OC ||

(31) Fire

"I can't help but love you even though I try not to. I can't help but want you, I know that I'd die without you."

-Ruelle

My new quarters are a slight upgrade from my last. Sure, they almost look the exact same, but there's a few changes. The room is about three times bigger, and instead of a single mattress I now have a double which is placed under a large window overlooking the coruscant skyline. But, other than that, it's the same, even the smell oddly enough.

"Looks like we're neighbors." The doors open to reveal Anakin leaning against the frame. His arms are crossed and that mischievous smile is alight on his face. My stomach does a summersault as I make my way towards him. The door closes behind Anakin as he closes the distance between us, taking my hands in his, "Hi." He says, his smile turning into something more profound.

"Hi." I breathe, lost in the thought and presence of him. His eyes are the most vibrant shade of blue I have ever seen and I find myself wanting to kiss him. But instead, I answer to his comment from before, "Yeah, looks like we are." He laughs a bit, pulling me into a hug. I blink in surprise, unsure of what to do for a moment as I stand in his embrace.

Worry begins to consume me and suddenly I can only think about how bad this was. We couldn't be doing this. If we were caught, it would be over. We would be over.

"Anakin..." I whisper, pushing him back. I can sense his disappointment  and worry as I step back, "We can't do this, you know it isn't right."

He sucks in a breath as realization crosses his face. He's silent for a moment before he responds, his voice low, "Leora I don't care. As long as I'm with you the only thing I will ever care about is you. You are the right thing."

Once again, I blink in surprise, my breath catching before a flash of annoyance takes hold inside of me, "If you really cared about me, we wouldn't be doing this. We wouldn't be breaking the code, sneaking around like... like-"

"Like normal people?" Anakin offers and I nod, snapping my fingers as I try to figure out how to convey everything that has been pointed up inside of me.

"Yes, like normal people, but aren't normal people, we're Jedi, we have a responsibility to normal people." Frustration burns like a fire as I run my fingers through my hair, tears burning in my eyes as I take in the hurt and.. betrayal on Anakin's face. I don't even have to read his emotions.

"Anakin, I care about you... more than I'd like to admit but I also care about the order, about the life we've built. If we're found out we'll be shamed, disgraced. And I can't- I don't know how I'd be able to live with myself if you were kicked out because of me."

"Leora we can be careful, we can do things right, easy." Anakin pleads and I can feel my heart bleed inside of me. Why do I feel this way? We only shared two kisses. Sure, we've spent almost our entire lives together, but never have I felt this sort of... pull, this longing. I can't even begin to describe it. There is no doing it right because our very relationship would be wrong. He's the chosen one and I would be pulling him away from the prophecy, from the light. It would be my fault if something ever happened to him.

"Anakin we can't do this, I can't live a lie." Shaking my head, I look down whispering my next words, "You left me on Tatooine." Looking back up at him, I meet his eyes, "You left me on Tatooine and you could have died!"

"Leora," Anakin pleads, voice soft yet firm, "I had to, if something were to happen to you, I don't know what I would do." He grabs my hands softly, holding them up, "When you were facing Dooku I was so scared, so scared that I was going to loose you." He bowed his head, "I was going to loose you and it was going to be my fault."

"I make my own decisions Anakin." I replied softly, squeezing his hands, "Dooku was about to kill you as well and I just coudn't..." I trailed off, not knowing what to say next.

After a moment of silence, Anakin spoke, "The closer I get to you the worse it gets. The thought of not being with you... I can't breathe. I'm haunted by the kiss that you should have never given me. My heart is beating, hoping that kiss will not become a scar. You are in my very soul, tormenting me.. what can I do? I will do anything that you ask." The sincerity in his voice causes my heart to shatter, and I gasp at the pain inside of me, clutching my chest. Anakin's arms are immediately around me holding me up. I let him. I let him hold me because at this moment, I am selfish.

And I'm selfish as I kiss him, my fingers threading through his hair and grasping his soft locks. I'm selfish as I lead him toward my bed, the both of us falling back. I'm selfish as I allow the feelings inside of me to take hold, a tight tension building in my stomach as his hands roam over my body, causing my back to arch. I'm selfish as our robes are torn off of eachother, landing on the ground in some unknown place. I'm selfish as I kiss him harder when he enters me, as we both give into each other, trusting the other with everything that we know, everything that we have.

We're like a fire, warm, beautiful and comforting. But left unchecked we burn uncontrollably, unable to stop. And right now, we're  burning with such a passion that we're burning each other in the process. Everything about us is consuming and beautiful and I wouldn't have it any other way.

When the release hits us both at the same time, he rolls over to my side, holding me as I drift to sleep. I dream of colors and a beautiful place, a world I wished to call my own.

When I wake up he is gone, leaving me with the memory of him.