𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎... // 𝙵𝚎𝚛𝚛𝚊𝚗 𝚃𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚎𝚜

11

~ Author's Note ~

Guys I realised I never actually specified this, and I just assumed you would know, but I shouldn't, so I'll tell you this.

In this fan fiction, Sira doesn't exist.

Or whatever.

You know, I'm super happy for Ferran to have such a lovely girlfriend, but I'm writing a fan fiction and I can do what I want. And that would just complicate things. I hope you understand. :)

REGRETTING

Jadrien's Perspective

I remember when I woke up that morning, knowing that I had to go back to Barcelona, I regretted last night deeply. I lay in the hotel room bed, stiff with regret. I should've talked to him more. I should've done more. That was my only chance, and I ended it in simply giving him my number and running off? No proper goodbye or anything... That was so stupid of me! My thoughts were something like these.

I remember the whole flight home that day, I felt awful. I should've done more. I met the guy I've been watching for years, wanting for years, and there I went and blew it! Completely blew it!

Eric, being the awesome younger brother he is, was waiting for me in the airport the moment I got in. He smiled, saying, "How was it?"

"Fine," I muttered, not really in the mood to talk about it.

He understood, so we got to the car around all the paparazzi and fans as quickly as we could, and he started driving. "Thanks for picking me up," I say simply.

"No problem," he says simply. We drive in silence for a few minutes, before he finally says, unable to deal with my unknown reasons for having such a sour mood for no longer, "Okay, Jade, so what happened? Something with Phil?"

"No. Phil was fine," I say flatly.

"Then what was it? Don't tell me anything happened with Ferran," he sighed.

"Okay, then I won't tell you what happened with Ferran."

"Tell me, Jade," Eric says. "Or else I'm dropping you off here and you're walking home." This is half teasing and half honesty. Eric goes to interesting extents to prove a point if he feels he really needs to.

I sighed, rolling my eyes. "He was really nice at the bar we were at... Talked to me a lot. Then me, being stupid as I am, just gave him my number and ran off. This was my one chance, Eric! I could've done anything, but I didn't! I just gave him my number and ran off!"

"What else would you have done but just that?" asked my brother, eyebrows furrowed.

"I don't know! Flirted more! Tried to charm him! Talk about more deeper things than the weather and how you're doing at Barcelona! Better things! It was a stupid encounter, Eric. It went no where."

"You understand that no matter what you would have done, it's not like you'd make Ferran just suddenly fall for you, right?" Eric asks, obviously judging of my way of thinking about this. "Besides, you live across a couple European countries and the Bay of Biscay and the English Channel. Do you really expect anything should've come out of this?"

"I don't know!" I said, just feeling awful about the whole thing, especially now that Eric wasn't even comforting me, but instead pointing out all the unreasonable flaws in what I was saying. "We could've had something long-distance, couldn't we have?"

"Jade, you hardly know each other!" Eric suddenly snapped, which shut me up, because he was right.

Ugh, why is Eric always so damn right about everything? It's not fair.

I few days later, I spoke to Isabella about it, and she had a different view. Not one that made me feel any better, though. She scolded me for not doing better. "Oh my God, Jade," she said, rolling her eyes after I had told her the whole thing, including at the end what Eric said about it.

We were sitting in my living room. Eric was at training, so it's not like we were bothering him or anything. 

"You should've just licked your lips and pulled at his collar or something. Make him red. Give him an erection, girl. Make him like you. That's the way you do it. Flash him or something! I don't know! Something more! You can't just expect to get a man and do nothing to try to get him! Men don't just fall in love with a girl because they're nice and good-looking the way us girls do. They need to see it. Feel it. It's a physical thing for them. You'll never get the guys you want if you keep acting like a giddy middle school girl waiting for them to come to you."

I sighed. "I don't know, Isabella."

"I do! How many boyfriends have you had?"

"Like, none," I rolled my eyes in embarrassment.

"How many have I had?"

"More than ten."

"So who is doing it better?" she smirked. "Someone has a right way and somebody is doing it wrong."

"Maybe we're both doing it wrong, Isabella. Because how many breakups have you had? The same amount of boyfriends you have, haven't you?"

"Listen, Jade, you just have to wait until the right guy comes along-"

"Ferran is the right guy! He... he has to be. But... the right guy for me is the one that is going to see me beyond my body, Isabella."

"Jadrien, it's stupid to think that way."

"Everyone wants me! I'm a freaking model! You would think I would have more boyfriends! But I want someone who will actually love me!"

"Yeah, and you don't even know Ferran Torres that well! How do you know he's who you want? It was the same with Phil Foden! You see a hot guy and get obsessed! It doesn't have to do with wanting your body to be valued! You just see him and want him! And I'm saying that it's fine if you want to chase guys, but if you're going to, and not wait for the right guy, then you've got to get them to be interested, Jadrien."

I shook my head, because what she said made sense. But I didn't like it, and I didn't want to be doing that crap.