𓈊 Petal's Diary

Entry #50

TW: mention of sexualising

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jimmy wouldn't stop pestering me by spam calling and texting me while Zach was having dinner with his parents and his siblings, so I finally decided to answer.

"hello?" I grumbled.

jimmy gasped and shouted, "Scott!" he cleared his throat and tried again. "I- I mean, hey, Scott," he said calmly.

I would have laughed if I was in a good mood. "hey, jimmy," I replied exhaustedly. "are you calling to call me a whore again?"

"wha-" jimmy paused. "I'm sorry?"

"you know, like you have been doing the past few days?"

"I'm very confused," he said. "can you slow down, back up, and start over?"

I sighed. "listen, I get it, okay?" I said, still sniffling from crying earlier. "you only ever wanted to be friends with me so you could get in my pants. it's not original. you're not the first to do it, and by now I know you won't be the last. just... please, for your sake and mine, leave me alone, jimmy."

"I... I don't get it," jimmy mumbled into the phone. "I never said I wanted to... get in your pants."

"you called me 'princess'," I said slowly. the beat of silence that carried down the line was painful. "it's a pet name." another pause from both of us. "like... how people call each other pet names in bed...?"

jimmy gasped. "what?!" he exclaimed, startling me. "no, I never meant it like- well, I didn't mean it at all, but god, no, I didn't mean it like that!"

I paused again, tears forming in my eyes. "oh."

"that's what you thought I meant?" jimmy asked. "Scott?"

"w-well..." I trailed off, sighing. "usually guys just call me things like that to sexualize me, so... you know..." I groaned, then let out a frustrated sob. "I'm so stupid,"I whined. "I thought I was being smart by putting the pieces together..."

"Scott, I would never do that," jimmy said after more silence. "I'm really sorry for calling you that. I shouldn't have. It was wrong." I didn't answer ans he sighed. "I get it if you still don't want to be friends with me," he continued, "but I really am sorry. for what I said about you losing your virginity to a senior, too. that was... that was really awful of me."

"I'm sorry, too, jimmy," I sobbed suddenly. "I was rude, and" - I stopped for a moment to sniffle loudly - "I said mean things to you that I didn't mean-"

"hey, it's okay," jimmy said. "I deserved it anyway." he laughed softly.

"you mean it?"

"yeah, I mean it."

"okay." I took a shaky deep breath.

Jimmy paused. "are you alright?"

I let out a breathy chuckle. "yeah, I'm fine," I answered, wiping at my eyes. "dorry, I didn't mean to start crying. that was really dumb."

"no, no, it's fine.

there was a brief moment of quiet before I spoke. "jimmy?"

"yeah?"

"can you... give me until the weekend?" I asked nervously. "I want us to be friends again."