𝓛𝓸𝓼𝓽 𝓱𝓸𝓹𝓮𝓼 ~ 𝓼𝓸𝓾𝓽𝓱 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓴

~Part 8~~Bowline knot~

WARNING: SUICIDE

*Stan just sits there in shock for a second, staring at his dad lying unconscious in his arms. "W...What the hell?!.." he mutters again, still sounding in shock, as he tries to figure out what just happened. His dad has never passed out drunk in front of him before, at least not that Stan can remember. Stan just looks down at his dad with a strange look of bewilderment and confusion on his face as he tries to process this whole situation... "What the hell...?!.." *Stan says for the third time, sounding completely baffled.*

*Stan stands up and slowly walks over to his room, with his dad unconscious on the floor. He starts crying again as he thinks about everything that's happened tonight. His mind is racing, filled with thoughts, emotions, and fears. He looks back at his dad on the floor for one last look, then goes up the stairs into his room. Once inside, he starts to cry even harder, and collapses on the floor, his thoughts and feelings all over the place...* "Why does this keep happening to me?!" *he cries out to no one in particular, as the lump in his throat grows bigger...*

*Stan looks up at the ceiling and keeps crying, his mind filled with all kinds of thoughts and emotions. He starts to hyperventilate, and his vision starts to go dark... he can't believe this. His whole life is falling apart right in front of him. "Why does this keep happening?!" he cries out, his vision blurring as he's on the verge of losing control. "Why?!" he says, looking up at the ceiling again. "Oh God... Please, what do I have to do to make my life better?!" he cries out, a tear rolling down his cheek again.*

Stan sees rope on the floor

His dad used to be a sailor, before he got lost in drugs and alcohol

He taught Stan how to tie many knots

Bowline knot.

*Stan closes his eyes and lets himself slip into the darkness... "It won't stop..." He thinks to himself in the last moments of his life. "It'll never stop!" he cries out in his mind, the weight of everything he's been through finally catching up with him. "... It'll never stop... I'm so... I'm so... I'm so..." *His thoughts trail off, his vision goes dark... and then... everything fades to black... End of Story*

Before Stan died, he wrote a note

I̶ ̷f̵e̶e̶l̸ ̷c̸e̴r̶t̷a̵i̷n̵ ̴I̷ ̸a̵m̷ ̸g̷o̵i̴n̸g̵ ̷m̸a̴d̵ ̸a̷g̸a̵i̸n̷.̷ ̶I̵ ̶f̶e̴e̵l̶ ̵w̷e̶ ̷c̸a̴n̸'̶t̶ ̶g̵o̴ ̸t̷h̶r̸o̸u̶g̴h̸ ̵a̸n̴o̶t̷h̷e̴r̸ ̵o̷f̸ ̵t̶h̶o̵s̵e̵ ̷t̶e̶r̵r̷i̸b̷l̵e̷ ̵t̴i̴m̵e̵s̷.̵ ̷A̶n̶d̶ ̵I̸ ̵s̴h̶a̷n̴'̸t̸ ̴r̵e̶c̴o̵v̸e̶r̵ ̴t̷h̷i̶s̸ ̷t̶i̶m̸e̷.̶ ̸I̶ ̶b̷e̸g̵i̷n̶ ̵t̶o̴ ̶h̴e̶a̴r̶ ̷v̶o̸i̴c̶e̴s̵,̴ ̸a̷n̵d̵ ̶I̶ ̷c̷a̷n̴'̷t̷ ̶c̵o̷n̷c̵e̶n̶t̵r̵a̶t̵e̷.̶ ̸S̴o̴ ̵I̷ ̶a̷m̶ ̶d̶o̷i̴n̵g̴ ̴w̷h̸a̷t̵ ̸s̷e̵e̵m̷s̵ ̵t̷h̴e̴ ̴b̷e̸s̷t̷ ̶t̵h̶i̶n̸g̵ ̷t̷o̵ ̵d̸o̸.̴ ̵Y̴o̴u̷ ̵h̸a̷v̵e̷ ̸g̴i̸v̶e̸n̵ ̷m̵e̶ ̶t̴h̶e̸ ̴g̴r̵e̸a̴t̶e̴s̵t̶ ̶p̵o̴s̸s̴i̷b̷l̷e̸ ̷h̷a̵p̶p̷i̵n̶e̴s̵s̴.̴ ̶Y̷o̵u̶ ̶h̷a̷v̴e̴ ̶b̴e̴e̶n̵ ̷i̷n̸ ̷e̸v̷e̵r̵y̸ ̵w̸a̶y̶ ̸a̷l̶l̸̶t̶h̷a̷t̴ ̷a̷n̷y̸o̵n̴e̷ ̴c̸o̵u̶l̵d̷ ̶b̶e̵.̴ ̸I̷ ̴d̶o̶n̴'̶t̷ ̸t̷h̶i̵n̷k̸ ̶t̸w̷o̶ ̷p̸e̴o̸p̶l̸e̸ ̴c̷o̴u̶l̴d̵ ̷h̵a̸v̵e̵ ̸b̸e̴e̴n̷ ̶h̷a̷p̵p̶i̴e̴r̵ ̴t̸i̴l̶l̷ ̴t̷h̸i̵s̷ ̷t̸e̵r̴r̵i̴b̵l̶e̴ ̴d̵i̷s̴e̶a̵s̸e̷ ̸c̷a̵m̴e̴.̴ ̴I̵ ̴c̷a̷n̸'̶t̴ ̶f̷i̷g̶h̸t̷ ̵a̷n̵y̷ ̷l̵o̷n̶g̴e̶r̸.̴ ̶I̴ ̴k̵n̷o̵w̸ ̷t̴h̴a̸t̶ ̵I̶ ̸a̶m̴ ̶s̸p̸o̶i̸l̷i̶n̴g̴ ̴y̷o̷u̸r̶ ̵l̶i̴f̵e̸,̵ ̸t̶h̵a̸t̴ ̴w̸i̴t̷h̶o̵u̸t̴ ̶m̷e̶ ̷y̵o̸u̶ ̸c̷o̵u̶l̷d̶ ̸w̵o̵r̴k̷.̶ ̴A̷n̷d̴ ̸y̷o̶u̴ ̷w̴i̶l̶l̶ ̵I̶ ̶k̴n̸o̷w̷.̸ ̷Y̷o̷u̴ ̷s̷e̶e̶ ̸I̵ ̴c̷a̸n̵'̵t̸ ̵e̷v̵e̸n̷ ̷w̵r̵i̸t̴e̴ ̷t̵h̴i̸s̷ ̴p̵r̸o̴p̸e̴r̸l̸y̶.̵ ̴I̸ ̶c̷a̸n̵'̵t̷ ̸r̵e̵a̵d̴.̶ ̷W̸h̶a̵t̸ ̷I̷ ̸w̵a̴n̶t̴ ̷t̴o̷ ̴s̶a̶y̴ ̴i̵s̴ ̵I̸ ̵o̵w̷e̸ ̷a̸l̷l̴ ̸t̶h̴e̴ ̴h̷a̶p̴p̸i̶n̶e̴s̶s̴ ̴o̵f̸ ̵m̸y̷ ̴l̴i̶f̶e̷ ̷t̵o̶ ̸y̵o̶u̸.̵ ̸Y̷o̶u̸ ̸h̵a̴v̷e̶ ̷b̴e̵e̸n̸ ̶e̴n̸t̶i̶r̶e̵l̶y̸ ̵p̵a̴t̶i̴e̴n̸t̶ ̷w̶i̸t̸h̸ ̶m̵e̵ ̴a̶n̴d̶ ̵i̴n̸c̵r̴e̴d̴i̸b̵l̴y̷ ̶g̷o̶o̸d̸.̸ ̵I̷ ̷w̸a̴n̶t̷ ̵t̷o̵ ̵s̵a̵y̶̴t̷h̷a̴t̴ ̵-̸ ̶e̴v̶e̸r̴y̷b̸o̶d̴y̵ ̶k̵n̴o̸w̵s̵ ̵i̴t̷.̷ ̷I̵f̴ ̶a̵n̶y̸b̶o̴d̶y̷ ̸c̴o̸u̶l̷d̴ ̸h̷a̷v̸e̸ ̴s̷a̶v̵e̷d̷ ̴m̶e̵ ̴i̶t̶ ̷w̷o̶u̷l̷d̴ ̶h̵a̴v̶e̴ ̷b̶e̸e̶n̵ ̶y̶o̷u̵.̵ ̸E̴v̷e̷r̴y̵t̶h̸i̴n̴g̶ ̵h̸a̵s̷ ̶g̵o̶n̵e̶̴f̴r̵o̵m̷ ̸m̷e̸ ̵b̴u̶t̸ ̵t̷h̵e̶ ̵c̵e̵r̵t̸a̸i̸n̵t̴y̸ ̵o̵f̵ ̵y̷o̷u̸r̴ ̵g̸o̵o̵d̶n̶e̴s̶s̵.̶ ̶I̸ ̶c̸a̵n̸'̶t̸ ̸g̶o̴ ̷o̴n̴ ̷s̴p̴o̵i̷l̷i̸n̷g̷ ̸y̴o̵u̴r̸ ̶l̵i̷f̴e̸ ̶a̶n̴y̷ ̴l̶o̸n̶g̶e̴r̶.̶

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Kenny runs into the house

"Oh God!" *Kenny yells instantly, seeing Stan hanging from the ceiling. His eyes and his face fill with complete shock and terror, as his blood runs cold upon seeing Stan's body hanging there. "Oh God!" Kenny yells again, his voice shaking with fear and horror as he runs into the room and stops in his tracks. His breath instantly catches in his throat, and his eyes go wide as he looks up at Stan, his mind flooded with emotions and thoughts. "Oh no... No, no! Stan! Oh my God!!!" Kenny yells in horror when his eyes first lock onto Stan's body...*

"Sta-an! Stan! No-oh God... Please!" *Kenny yells, looking up at Stan and screaming in utter disbelief and terror. His heart starts pounding a thousand times faster, he keeps shaking with fear and starts crying instantly, unable to believe what he's seeing in front of him. Kenny keeps yelling for Stan, but gets no response or reaction from Stan. His mind starts running a mile a minute, desperate and hopeless, not wanting to think about what he's seeing here. "Stan, oh my God, please!" *Kenny yells again,* "God... Please! Please! PLEASE!"

*Kenny quickly steps up on the platform and pulls Stan off the rope, immediately calling the ambulance. Kenny's face is filled with pure shock and terror as he holds Stan's body in his arms, his heart still pounding a hundred miles an hour and in complete panic. "Oh no... God... Please... No... Oh no!" Kenny yells, still holding onto Stan, who remains unconscious and motionless in Kenny's arms... "Stan..." Kenny cries out in a weak, trembling voice, still being unable to fully comprehend what's happened in front of him...*

(Words: 856)

(Published: 13/5/23)