Why Not Me (why can't it be me?) [Vini & Dalilah]

Kabanata 4

“Come on! There is no need to be badtrip, Vini! It’s just one game. You can always try again naman, e,” I said while trying to cheer him up and convince him that losing was okay. Palibhasa kasi ay hindi siya sanay na natatalo.

Hindi niya ako sinagot, nanatili ang higpit ng hawak niya sa manibela at ‘yong diretsong tingin sa kalsada.

Ugh! Really? He was pissed off just because of a board game? Alam kong big deal ‘yon sa kaniya, pero bakit naman ganito ang galit niya?

Nanahimik na ako at hinayaan na lamang muna siya na magmove-on mula sa nangyari, but inside me, I was really thinking how did that happen. He was about to win. He was getting there. I might not know stuff about Chess, pero base roon sa mga komento noong mga members ng club habang naglalaro sila ay siya ‘yong lamang at ilang galaw na lang daw ay panalo na siya.

Or maybe he was not inspired because Kisses was not there to cheer for him?

My lips protruded at that bitter thought.

But I was there!

Was I not enough?

I felt my heart suddenly enveloped with fear remembering what Dee-dee had told me. Na baka heto na ‘yon. Nagsisimula na akong kuwestiyunin ‘yong sarili kong halaga.

I sighed, shook my head harshly, and convinced myself that I was not becoming like that. And maybe I really just heard him wrong! Kasi hindi na niya nababanggit pa ulit sa akin ‘yong sinabi niyang liligawan daw niya si Kisses.

While on the road home, I suddenly remembered Ellis. We exchanged phone numbers last night so I was able to text him and apologized again for Vini’s behavior. I also explained why we already needed to go. Ayokong isipin niya na bully si Vini. Mabait naman siya, e. He was just being strange lately.

    Ellis: Wala ‘yon. Anyway, I passed the tryouts. I am officially a member of the Chess club. :)

    Ako: Really? Wow! Congrats, Ellis! Who said being nerd sucks?

    Ellis: [laughing emoji] Thank you, Dalilah. See you tomorrow!

    Ako: See you!

Nang mag-send iyon ay muli akong nag-angat ng tingin at napataas ng kilay kay Vini nang makita siyang mariing nakatitig doon sa cellphone ko. And if just by looking, my cellphone would already have exploded in my hand at the intensity of his stares.

“Ah, Ellis texted me and told me that he passed the tryouts and is now a part of the Chess club,” kuwento ko.  “Alam mo ba na mahilig din siya sa Chess tulad mo? Tingin ko ay magkakasundo kayong dalawa.”

“Do I look like I give a damn about him?” pagsusungit niya.

“Hey! Why are you like that to him? Vini, Ellis is a good guy. Alam mo ba na parati siyang nabu-bully doon sa dati niyang school? I feel bad for him and that’s just so sad. Hindi ka ba naaawa sa kaniya?” I said, not really meaning to gossip about that thing to other people because that was already too personal, but I just wanted him to give Ellis some empathy. At malay mo nga ay maging magkaibigan pa silang dalawa!