Love Blaine

Chapter 14

Three weeks after the start of the new school year:

Kurt, Rachel, Sam and Finn agreed to meet in the park on Saturday noon. They want to use the last bit of summer and decide to do a little picnic.

"So. What's new?" Finn asks, catching up on the stuff Rachel, Sam and Kurt can talk about in school. It really sucks to go to a different school but that should change when they all go to high school together.

"Blaine said they have the gym class exam we had last year in fall this year" kurt tells and looks at the little scar at his wrist that will stay. It's about four centimeters long and normally Kurt would hate it but He found a new friend that day and his dad fell in love again.

For a moment there's silence before Sam clears his throat and says "I have to tell you something. I realized it about myself and you're the first one to tell because I didn't talked to my parents yet or said it aloud".

He swallows before sayign quietly "I'm bisexual". It felt good to hve it said aloud and so he repeats himself but this time in his normal voice "I'm bi and I realized because I think I might have a little crush on Landon from our gym class. We get along well and I find him quite attractive and yes I like him".

"Oh Sammy that's amazing" Rachel says, hugging him "We need details. Do you know how he feels? Is he straight? Will you ask him out?". "Rach you're suffocating him" Finn says and laughs about the exitement of the girl. Then he too hugs Sam, Kurt doing the same after him.

>>><<<

In the evening Kurt has to admit that Sams coming out got him thinking. Also he isn't good in hiding because Finn says "Penny for your thoughts". After eating dinner at Breadstix together Carol and Finn are now staying for the night so Finn sleeps on a mattress in Kurts room.

"What if I'm not straight either? I noticed before that I don't really like girls the way you and Sam always talk about. I don't see girls that way but I'm not sure if I see boys that way because I never really paid too much attention" Kurt tells "Maybe I'm gay".

"Can I be honest with you?" Finn asks and when the other boy nods he continues "I thought about that too. Not about me but about you. Rachel, Sam and I wondered if you maybe have a crush on Blaine. You always talk about him, he's in your mind, you smile when it comes to him like you do now and you're happier and like you're over the moon".

That gets Kurt to think even more "I- I never really thought about it but it makes sense. Kinda. But don't you have to find that person or gender attractive? I never saw Blaine. Not real life or a picture or anything".

"I have no clue about that but maybe sleep over it, let it sink in and think about it. And if you want to talk about it again then I'll listen and try to help as good as possible" the taller boy says and adds "But let's go to bed now. It's late and we probably should be asleep already". "Right" Kurt agrees "Good night Finn and thank you". "No problem. Good night Kurt" Finn answers.

>>><<<

Dear Blaine
I have to tell you something that got me thinking, This weekend my friends and I went to have a picnic in the park and Sam came out to us as bisexual,
Over the week I more and more realized the way I think about girls differently than other boys or the way I think about boys in general,
Boys find girls attractive and other boys cool and girls find other girls pretty and boys attractive, Well, I do find girls pretty but boys too, But in a different way, And I don't find them cool, Does that make sense?
I kinda question my whole sexuality at the moment and it's so confusing which is bad because soon exams come up and I don't know if I can concentrate on both,
Have you already experienced something like that?
Love Kurt

>>><<<

Dear Kurt
No. Never. But what Sam did was very brave. Did he talked to his parents? And how did he realized it?
I think at some point everyone questions their sexuality so it's normal. Kurt know that you can talk to me about things where you don't know if it makes sense. We can try to figure it out together.
You get this with exams. I believe in you.
Just the questions about Sam.
Love Blaine

>>><<<

Kurts letter got Blaine thinking too because the things Kurt wrote in his letter fit to Blaine too. He noticed these things some times before. The way he thinks about girls and boys.

Maybe he's not straight either. He thought about it before. Once and only very short. But even tho Wes is Blaines best friend he didn't knew if he should talk about that with him.

He will think about it a bit more and see what Kurt writes in his next letter. Maybe then he'll talk to Wes.

>>><<<

Kurt too couldn't stop thinking about it after writing the letter to Blaine. He didn't talked about it with Finn anymore but first he has to sort his thoughts out and figure himself out.

Blaines letter helped him a little. He understands and he offered to help him in someway.

There's it again. Kurt noticed when Finn said it how Blaine affects him. The way he thought of Blaine makes him smile and lights his day. How he thinks about finally seeing Blaine and hugging him. One day.

He don't know what Blaine looks like and Blaine only told him that he has curls because he hates them but Kurt imagines his arms hugging him and yes after talking to Finn he also imagined Blaines lips on his once or twice.

But he doesn't know how Blaine feels and he also has no idea how he identifies himself so for now he'll keep it for him. He can still talk to Blaine without mentioning that it has something to do with him.

He was afraid but Kurt actually passed his exams with B's and C's. Better than he expected.