All Over Her

Chapter 23: Her Pain, Our Pain

Ziggy was awake before I was. The sun had just begun to come up. She was sitting with a blanket around her, holding her knees. Her head was down, her hair falling around her face. It was messy and tangled, the different shades of brown changing slowly as more light hit her. I realized I hadn't changed back. Once I did she became alert. She looked at me, her eyes red and puffy. She sniffled, her lip twitching slightly. She turned her head away. I got up, grabbing the other blanket to cover myself.
    "I could've killed him." She said quietly.
    "He's okay Ziggy, he's just fine. He said he won't tell anyone." I told her, rubbing her back softly.
    She pushed a chunk of hair out of her face, sniffling hard. "But I still could have hurt him. I don't get how he found us, or why he was here."
    I know it's technically not my fault, but I felt responsible. "It was my fault, he needed to talk to me.."
    Ziggy's eyes flattened.
    "But he really is okay. Don't worry about him, I have it handled. He's okay." I said, now holding her tightly.
    She began to sob, "I hate this. I don't wanna hurt people. I wanna be home, with our dads. I don't like hiding this but I know I have to. Dad told me what would happen if people knew, no one would treat me the same. But I'm miserable. I feel like I'm lying to everyone.. Lying to George. He wanted to spend the night last night but I had to lie to him."
    "I know.. I know.. I'm sorry." I held her as she continued to cry.
    It stung my heart to see her like this, but it hurt even more knowing I can't help her. This won't go away, it's not something she chose, and while it is a part of her not everyone will love her just as much. Some might hate her without even knowing her. I will never be able to fully understand what she's going through, I can only be there to tell her she doesn't have to hide. If all else she won't have to hide with me, or Harry, or our dads. I just wish I could take her pain and make it my own, even just for a second.
    I rubbed her head, getting up and walking to the backpack. I grabbed our clothes, we brought our robes in case we woke up too late to go back to the dorms. Luckily class doesn't start for about an hour to an hour and a half so we should be fine. Harry always waits in our dorm the morning after wolf nights. He wants to hear everything that happened, but I don't know if Ziggy would want to relieve it. Luckily she needs to brush her hair and fix herself up so she'll be in the bathroom while I tell Harry.
    I gave her her robes. As we both got dressed her crying ceased. Her face relaxed into a ghostly frown. She seemed weak, defeated. We walked quietly back through the dark hall and out towards the willow. The tree greeted us, as if it knew who we were. What we were doing. Ziggy wore the backpack again, I assumed it gave her comfort. When we got back to our dorm, Harry was just waiting outside, half asleep. He woke up the second he saw us.
    "Zig are you alright?" He said, holding the door open for us.
    Harry was the only other person that had a key to unlock our room, a special request we made to the headmaster.
    I led her to the bathroom. "A lot happened last night Harry.."
    Harry closed the door the same moment Ziggy closed the bathroom's, giving me a countdown to give him a recap. He sat at my desk, looking at me expectedly.
    "Well? What happened? She looks like shit." He said. I knew he didn't mean to be rude but that's just how brothers talk I suppose.
    "Well everything was going as it always does until.." I trailed off, reflecting on the night.
    Feeling the adrenaline rush through my body the moment I saw Zig's hand. Jumping at Mattheo... being on top of Mattheo.. Yelling at him. Hurting him.
    "Until what J?" Harry said, snapping me back into focus.
    "Mattheo Riddle found us, he followed us while we weren't looking, then Ziggy swung at him. I was able to get him out of the way but Ziggy feels horrible."
    Harry rubbed his head, pushing back his glasses that were sliding off.
    "Is Mattheo okay?"
    I nodded.
    "Are you?"
    I gave another nod, less sure than my last.
    "Poor Zig man..."
    Ziggy came out of the bathroom, looking herself again. Her eyes were still puffy but the swelling was going down.
    Harry went up to her without saying a word, hugging her tightly. I joined in and hugged them too.