Settle down

Chapter 29

"Lola! What are you doing? You're not supposed to drink, remember?" She whispers to me. If I don't drink I don't think I'll survive.
"Change in plans, but don't worry. We'll come home safely anyway." I tell her. I don't want her to think that I'm gonna leave her or anything.
"That's not what I'm worried about." She drags me off to the side. "You said you don't drink. If you've never drunk before it's very easy to get effected." She says with a worried look. What she don't know is that this is not the first time I drink. Not even close. It's the first time this year, yes, but not ever. I move a lot and I used to change pesonality for every new place and one time it ended up quite badly. I started to hang out with the wrong people and those people made me do stupid things. I never told anyone about this, not my parents, not my friends. No one knows except those people I hung out with. The reason that I never told anyone is simple. I'm embarrassed and scared. I'm embarrassed about the things I did, at the time it was cool, but the person I was is not something to be proud of. I drank too much all the time, I partied a lot and I was awfully mean to innocent people. I was not in control of my life and I hated it. I'm scared that anyone will find out. I'm scared that anyone will find out about all the things I did and look at me different. The person I am now is the real me and the person I want to be. The reason I haven't drunk for a year now is because I hate what alcohol once did to me and I don't want it to happen again.
"It's okay Sally. I'm not going to go crazy. Go enjoy yourself and don't worry about me." I smile and she noddes and walks back to Niall. I follow her and when I come back I see that Harry has taken the seat next to mine. I sit down and start sipping on my drink. Sally and Niall are already in another deep conversation and so they don't notice anything around them.
"Hey Lola. How are you?" A dark, raspy and brittish voice next to me asks. I'm so mad at him right now.
"For what to you care. Did you set this up? Did you plan to meet me here so you could hurt me even more?" I ask with a harsh tone. His eyes are neutral and I can't read them.
"Lola about today......you know..I... I didn't mean what I said." He says and looks at me. I down the rest of my drink and order another one, but I don't answer him. I feel the familiar feeling of alcohol running down my throat. I would lie if I said I haven't missed this.
"Okay, you don't talk to me. That's understandable I suppose, but believe me. I didn't mean to hurt you." Oh yes you did. Otherwise you wouldn't have said it. I down the next drink as well and I feel my anger dissolving and growing at the same time.
"Lola, take it easy with the alcohol." He says and takes the glass from me. Leave me alone!
"Stop telling me what to do!" I say and take the glass back. He shouldn't say anything, he's been drinking this clear liguid in his glass non stop. It's probably vodka or something.
"Okay, okay. I'm just worried about you Lols." His voice is giving me a head ache.
"You don't give a flying fuck about me! Can't you go get another girl to annoy?" I yell at him.
"Wow, so you curse now?" He asks with a laugh. I can tell it's been a while since I last drank, because I already feel funny and I've only had three drinks.
I feel like a grumpy old lady, because I yell at everything Harry says when he says it with a huge grin on his face.
"You are much more fun when you're drunk!" Harry laughs at me.
"Can you stop saying that? I don't even want to listen to you! And I'm not drunk!"
"Oh, yes you are!" He says and fills his glass.
"Hey Lola? You having fun? Niall and I are just going to get some fresh air okay?" Sally comes from no where and says. I nod and wave her off.
"Do you know what's weird Lola? Other girls usually get really flirty when they're drunk, but you just get grumpy" Harry says and pokes my waist.
"Oh, I can be very flirly" I say and start blinking with one eye and wiggling my eyebrows. Harry laughs like crazy and I start blinking to a man who's dancing and he catches it. He walk over to me and Harry does not notice till the man starts talking to me.
"Hey babe. Wanna dance?" The man asks and looks at me. I can't see his face very good but I don't care.
"Hell yeah!" I stand up and leave Harry by the bar disk. The music is very loud and I start dancing.
The man moves with me and I can no longer see the bar disk, there is too many people around. We dance and I laugh. I wonder why I never did something like this before. This is so much fun. The man comes closer to me and grabs me by my waist and keep dancing. I don't react until he starts grinding on me. I try to move away, but his grip is too strong. I panic slightly. He brings his face closer to mine.
"Stop. No, stop!" I'm not strong enough to break free. He comes even closer and I can smell smoke an alcohol on his breath.
"Please. Stop!" The sounds coming from me are not loud, but someone must have heard. The man grinds on me like crazy at the same time as he tries to kiss me. Someone push the man off me and step between us. To my suprise it's Harry. Deja vu. He looks at me and then turns to the man. He start walking towards the man, but I stop him.
"Harry what are you doing?! Leave him alone!" I yell and he turns to me again
"What? I'm helping you! What's wrong with you?!" He yells back at me.
"I wasn't asking for your help!? I've never in my life asked for your help!" Why does he always have to play the hero and the bad guy?
"It was obvious that you didn't like what he was doing! why can't you just say thank you?!" He looks furious, but I'm even more mad.
"Why can't you ever leave me alone?!?" I ask and run away. I keep running through the crowd of people until I find the bathrooms. I run into the ladies bathroom and stand infront of the mirrors and sinks. As I see myself in the mirror I start to cry. Tears stream down my cheeks. A loud bang filles the room when the bathroom door is smashed open revealing an angry Harry. I'm almost scared of him now. I press myself to the wall in the back of the room. Harry walks in and a woman speaks.
"This is the ladies bathroom. No men!" She shouldn't have said that.
"Get out now! Everyone!" Harry screams very loudly and every stall is emptied when the women run out. He hits the door very hard and turns to me. He walks up to me and screams again.
"I'm so sick of your crap Lola!" I'm so afraid I'm shaking. "Do you know why?! Because you're playing with me and I don't understand you!" He yells to my face and this pisses me off. I really should stay silent for my own good, but I can't.
"I'm the one playing with you?! Are you serious? You're the one who changes mood and personality every other second and I can't take it anymore! You are mean and hurt me and then you try to be my hero or something! You confuse me and freak me out. I hate you!" I yell at him.
"Do you know why I'm always around? Because you make me! You make me need you! You make me jealous and you make me do stupid things! You make me feel and I never feel anything. You freak me out too!" He shouts to me and then looks to the floor. His hand brushes through his hair and he turn around to leave. He slowly walks to the door but then stops dead in his tracks. He stand still for a few seconds and then turn to me again and walk towards me quickly. I think he's going to hit me and so I gringe, but instead he grabs my head and his soft lips crashes onto mine. The tension in my body relaxes and my lips move together with his. I don't feel drunk anymore. The kiss grows more passionate and he pushes me to the wall. He grabs me by my waist and lift me up and my legs lock around his torso. Without loosing contact he carries me to a desk and puts me down. I keep kissing him and I don't move even though I should. He places kisses along my neck but he stops when my phone starts ringing. I grab my purse and get my phone out.
"Hey Sally, what's up." I ask. Harry is standing very close to me, teasing me with his presence. He touches my hand with his.
"Where are you? Niall and I can't find either you or Harry. Are you guys together? Have you seen him?" She asks.
"Uhm. I'm in the bathroom. But I have not seen Harry in a while and he's definitely not here." I say and as I say Harry's name his eyes look at me questioning the situation.
"Oh I'm right outside the bathroom. See you in a sec." She says and hangs up.
"Shit! Go in there! I yell a Harry and push him towards a stall.
"No, why?" He says and pushes me in the other direction. Shit, he's stronger than me.
"Harry, just do it! Sally's coming!" He runs into the stall and a second after that Sally comes into the bathroom.
"Hi Lola! Come on, we need to find Harry. He's the only one who hasn't drunk anything tonight. Only he can drive us home." What. But I saw him drinking earlier. Oh! It must have been water. That means he wasn't drunk tonight, he wasn't drunk when kissing me.
"You know what. Go out to Niall. I'll be there in a sec." She nods and walks out the door. Just as the door closes Harry comes out from the stall and looks at me. I look at him and smile.
"We better go." I walk towards the door but Harry grabs my arm and pulls me back. He kisses my lips again, but this time it's slow and real. When we part I blush, turn around and leave.