Settle down

Chapter 41

He looks up at me and as soon as I see his face I relax. His face is softer than before and his eyes are kind. He tries to form a weak smile but fails. The attempt to ease the tension causes butterflies to form in my stomach. Gosh what he does to me. I fight the smile that wants to escape my lips and I stay serious. I still am mad at him, but he is making it hard for me.

"Hi." He says calmly.

"Hi." I respond and start digging in my bag for my car keys.

"Did you forget anything in the center? It's still open for another 20 minutes." I say when he doesn't say anything else. He responds with a sigh and walks up to me. He puts his hands on my waist and I back away.

"Lola I.... I'm sorry okay?" He says looking at me.

"For what?" I challenge him. Is he sorry for yelling at me or for flirting with others when there's obviously something going on between us? Does he know?

"I... Everything Lola. I'm sorry for everything. For being so confusing for you. I liked what was going on between us." He says.

"Really? And how do I know that you don't say this to all your girls?" I'm not gonna let him off the hook too easy.

"Why do think I would come here 9:30 at night if I didn't feel something for you?" He asks.

"You're desperate?" I say and a chuckle leaves his mouth revealing his beautiful dimples.

"It's true. I am, but not in the way you think I am." He says while smiling a shy smile.

"I'm mad at you." I say and stare at him. He doesn't look hurt at all.

"I know and it surprised me that it bothered me so much." He pauses "
To be honest you have done a lot of things to me that have surprised me." He says and looks a bit embarrassed.

"What do you want to have said with all this?" I ask meaning it. I want to know what this means for him. I need to know what's going to happen next. I can't take all the surprises and mood swings.
He looks away and all around us like he's thinking or making sure that no one hears. I hope the first.

"I've never been with someone, like together...." He drifts off.

"Continue." I say. He swallows a few times before he continues. Is he nervous?

"I like you. You're different and you make me feel weird." I look offended "In a good way." He adds.
"And I want to be with you. I'm definitely not ready to make it official Lola so don't expect me to be a boyfriend, but no more flirting." He looks up at me nervously and watch me carefully.

"I don't know Harry. We're so different and....arhh... I just think that we may fool ourselves." I say. I wish he was different or that I were. I don't know, but I wish it could work and be easy. He looks unpleasant with my answer.

"Don't opposites attract?" He says with a smile. "I know you like me too and your boyfriend also knows."

"Excuse me? What boyfriend?" I ask.

"This Tim of yours. Yeah I know him, he's been threatening me since day one to stay away from you." I feel shocked and confused. Tim? Why would he do that?

"You know what? I really don't want to talk about this right now." I say and open the car door.

"Lola." He warns.

"I'll see you tomorrow at school." I say and close the door. I drive away and I see him standing there. A part of me wanted to throw myself into his arms and say that we can be secret lovers for the rest of our lives but I know better. I know that if I give in to easily, he's gonna lose respect for me and treat me like shit. I like him too much to let that happen. My biggest fear now is that he stops trying, that he decides that I'm not worth it. I don't want to take that. I don't think I can.

When I get home I grab some of the dinner my family's already eaten and head to the TV. Tomorrow's Friday so I can go to bed later tonight. I watch an old episode of scrubs and then head up to my room where I wash my face and put on my pajamas. Just as I turn the light off the display on my phone lights up. It's a text. Two actually. One is from Sally, sent one hour ago.
Omg Lola! You have to come to my place tomorrow. Book in a sleepover because I have something GREAT to tell you! Love SALLY!
I don't respond but I will tomorrow.
The other text just came and it's from an unknown number.
I won't take no for an answer.
I think I have a pretty good guess who it is. On this text I do respond.
One try. I type and press send. Seconds later I see that he's read it. I see that he begins to type something but then he stops. I hate to admit it, but as I think about Harry I feel like a loved up 6 year old. I turn off my phone and fall fast asleep.