Blindspot

Chapter 20

Nam went back to her condo after dropping Rebecca to hers. She was putting on her night care facial mask when she heard her door bell ring.

"Eh? Who would be at my door at this hour?" Nam muttered to herself and looked through her doorway peephole. Freen was standing there with her overnight bag in one hand. A shocked Nam opened the door and was about to ask Freen why the late visit when Freen slipped through uninvited into Nam's home.

"I want to sleep over too. Where's Becky? Is she in your bedroom?" Freen asked.

"Uh...Uh..um." Nam was too stunned to speak.
Nam's home is a one bedroom condo with a den so it took less than a minute for Freen to figure out that Becky wasn't at Nam's for a sleepover.

"I don't understand. Where is Becky?" Freen asked again.

Nam sheepishly admitted, "I...we lied. We didn't have a sleepover. Becky's resting at her parent's place."

"I don't understand." Freen repeated and her brows furrowed. Nam took pity on Freen and invited Freen to sit down on her couch.

"Becky...just wanted some alone time. Some space to think."

"I ... don't understand. Space? To think about what?" Freen is really confused. She understood the words coming out of Nam's mouth but Freen could not for the life of her understand why Rebecca suddenly wanted alone time, why Rebecca had to make a lie about it, and most of all, she didn't understand why Rebecca seemed to be pulling away from her.

Nam could sense that Freen was struggling internally to make sense of it."Freen, if you don't mind me asking. What is Rebecca to you? Wait, let me simplify it because I'm afraid you are going to say 'I don't understand' again. In your heart, is Rebecca just a friend to you."

"No. She is more than a friend to me."

"If she's not a friend, then what is she?"

"Um...I don't know. She is like ...sunshine. A warm heater in the winter. Mookata. You know the feeling you get when you come home after a hard day of work. A blanket when I sleep, no matter if the night is cold or hot. She is like that to me."

"So...she's your comfort zone? Happiness."

"Yes. Something like that. She recharges me. I don't know what to call it but I know that she is not simply a friend."

"Have you ever experienced that before?"

"No. Never."

"Have you ever want to be closer or feel more towards Rebecca?" Nam tried to hint to Freen.

"I don't understand...more?"

"Hm...how can I make you understand...Oh! Remember when you were doing a photoshoot with Rebecca and you kissed her?" Nam remembered that romantic scene.

"Yes."

"Why did you kiss her?"

"I didn't mean to. The photographer asked us to imagine being in love and he kept asking me to get closer. I accidentally leaned too close and our lips touched."

"Eh?! No! No, that wasn't what it looked like. You were totally leaning in!" Nam was so sure that Freen had felt something for Rebecca, "fine! Let's say you accidentally kissed her. How did you feel when you kissed her? How did you feel afterwards?"

"It was nice. Her lips are very soft. I felt fine afterwards. Healthy."

"Argh! Are you wired differently? You're answering and deliberately not answering my questions! You should be a politician." Nam pulled her own hair in frustration, but she tried again and asked Freen, "do you think you can do that with someone else? Do you think you would want to kiss Rebecca outside of work? Kiss her when you want to. Hold her hand when you feel like it. Hug her when you want comfort?"
Freen sits quietly as she thinks about Nam's question. After a few moments, she replies Nam, "Yes. I can't imagine myself being able to do that with anyone else other than Rebecca and...I want to do all that with her and only her. Why are you asking me all these questions? What does that have to do with her lying to me? Why does she need space to think?"