The Kindness of Strangers

Ch. 17 - The Clinic

Thomas POV

I'm sweatin' like a damn hog in the summer as soon as my eyes open. I'm just happy My Love locked the door for me. Don't want Mama to see me in my underwear. I look in the mirror and feel my face stretch as I stick my tongue out at myself. I can never get used to missing so much, even after all this time. Aunt Verna did her best but she ain't God. My nose is probably splattered across some field with the rest of my face. I catch myself trying to scratch the itchy spots but stop before I do any damage. My Love told me she got me some fancy new creams from the pharmacy that'll help. I look out the window to see the sun just about to go down. It should cool down soon. I grab my rag out of my old pants to wipe off my sweat. Wonder if the mama that made me sweat like this too. Mama said she knew her from the slaughterhouse and that she was real nice but not much else. I'll have to ask if I remember later.

I put on my new fancy clothes and look in the mirror. My new cow-hide patterned shirt makes me smile. It looks really nice with my black tie. I almost look like those auction men who sell pigs and stuff. I sigh as I put my small half-mask on. Don't wanna deal with the sweat my good mask causes. I'll just end up makin' the leather stink and lord knows when my girl will be ready enough for me to get a new mask. I sit at my dresser and pat my blue makeup square, rubbing it on my eyelids like My Love showed me. It's much neater now and I don't use it as much as before.

I head downstairs and poke my head into the dining room. My Love and Mama are setting the table still. I head to the craft room to see Ms. Betty eating her seed on the floor. I pick her up gently and make soft happy sounds with her. Love Ms. Betty. I'm gonna let her play while we eat. Mama won't be mad as long as I sweep up her mess. I grab the little broom and pan and clean up her little poops and feathers. The sweet girl just cocks her head at me and follows me around as I clean. I throw out her mess and gently push her away from the door as I leave. Can't have her getting stepped on.

Mama is setting the dishes on the table for supper. I sit next to my love and wave at Drayton. He stares at me and huffs. I know he doesn't like makeup but he's been much nicer about it since Mama gave him a talkin' to. I serve everyone's plate since I didn't help make dinner tonight. I put extra veggies on my love's plate. She's so little she could use 'em. Mama always said veggies make you big and strong. Drayton could use more too but he's too picky.

My love seems to only be picking at her food by the time I'm done. She only has a little meat left. I tap her and try to ask her what's wrong. She gives me a nervous smile.

"I'm just curious about the clinic. Ever since I learned 'bout the Hartman family, they've had me worried a bit." I can feel both Drayton's and Mama's eyes on me. The memories don't hurt that much anymore, but I know what happened won't make 'em happy. I sigh and nod. I get up and grab a notebook and two pencils. Don't really wanna waste time using my knife to sharpen one pencil the whole time.

"It was a little after my older cousin Jackson's birthday. He felt bad cuz he couldn't handle a pig thief like Aunt Verna wanted him to. Drayton took us to play a trick on whoever came down the road first. It was some Hartman girl and her man. It was Jackson's job to get her to the barn so we could spook her...but she fell and got crushed. Her daddy got real mad at Aunt Verna and they took us away. We weren't good kids so they sent us to the clinic. Said we were sick in the head. I remember drawing a lot while there."

"They were bad people...I got hit a lot and called names for not talking. Zapped my head a lot when they felt like it. Thought it would get me to talk. I just didn't have anything to say..."

My love rubs my shoulder and puts her head against me while she reads.

"Something happened and a lot of us got out. I was walking outside and looking at the plants when Ike picked me up in a car with his lady. They had Jackson in there with the nice nurse. Ike wasn't very nice sometimes. He pointed knives at people and guns. But he was gonna take us to his Mama's house in Mexico. Gave me new clothes too."

I tapped my pencil on the table trying to remember how it all went.

"I sat outside the diner we found while Ike got us some food and other stuff for the trip. I got shot in the side when Ike and the nurse made people mad. You seen that scar when we bathe. We ran out of gas and had to walk across a big field. We went into the woods and found a trailer. The nice nurse took care of my wound there. Ike was mean to me and Jackson...we lost Ike at night. In the morning, Clarice was screaming about cops and we had to hide. She got killed by Hartman. The nurse ran away and made things hard. Hartman got dogs. We hid in a dead cow so they wouldn't find us."

I look up to see my love's pale face. She looked sad and confused.

"The nurse was mean and called for a cop that went across the bridge. Jackson tried to surprise the cop and take his gun. Killed him. I remember a lot of screaming and making the nurse drive by pulling her hair. I looked out the window when a cop was following me. He shot my face. The nurse crashed the car and the cop chained me up in a barn by our house. I only remember trying not to choke. I got drooped into something and hurt my leg bad. It's better now but when it rains it aches. Aunt Verna pulled me out and sewed me up. I did what she told me to and now everything is okay."

I look over to see my love crying. I hold her face and try my best.

"'S "kay" She nods and pushes her face into my hands and sobs. Mama grabs my notebook and starts reading it, her face also getting pale before passing it around the table. Everyone at the table begins to look sad. I feel my own eyes fill with tears. I didn't mean to make everyone sad at supper. I look at my love in concern and she shakes her head.

"You deserved so much better. Jackson deserved to be here with you. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time is all." Drayton smacks his lap angrily.

"If I hadn't tried to get you and Jed out there, none of that would've happened to you!" I shrug. I was little when it happened so I can't imagine it going any other way. I stand from my seat and give my Mama and Drayton a kiss on the head. I go to the record player to play something happy for us. The funniest one I can find is Yakkity Yak. I grab my lady's hands and stand her up against me to dance. I see her smile and giggle as the music starts to go through the cloud in her mind. I spin her around like grandpa showed me to do. It makes her frown nearly disappear so I pick her up in my arms and spin her real good. She squeals and holds on to me tight. My smile feels tight against my face but it's all worth it for her. It took me a long time to trust again. If I hadn't I wouldn't have met my sunflower. The girl who helped me find my lost voice.