Desire

CHAPTER TWENTY

Carter Gilmore

I decided to move back to my office in my house. It was my way of distancing myself from Adelaide. I couldn't sit there while was a few spaces away and not want to run to her.

That doesn't mean that I don't see her regularly at my house. Adelaide and Ella are like two peas in a pod inseparable. Right now Adelaide and Ella are getting ready for a night out.

She asked me for the day off and I gave it to her. I couldn't tell her that I didn't want her to go. I had to let her find her way back to me. I want her to want me.

It's Halloween and like an idiot, I have no fucking plans. So I decided I was just going to give candy out. I know. What a loser. I used to be the biggest Playboy and now I'm just a shell of what I used to be. All because of her.

I walk past my daughter's room the door wide open. I see Adelaide through a mirror facing away from the door. She's wearing a black tight dress that hugs every curve of her body. The front hangs down showing her perfect tits. She dressed like a devil, exactly what she is my devil.

"Mr Gilmore can you help me, please," she asked. Her face was blank. I couldn't read her expression. Shit, she saw me staring at her.

I don't understand she told me she didn't want anything to do with me. Why would she ask me to help her when Ella could walk in and see us? Maybe, this is her way of playing with me.

I know it should walk away but instead, I walk into the room. As soon as I do the air feels thinner. I take slow steps until I reach her and stand at her back.

She shivers and I haven't touched her yet. I took the material and I held it in my hand. It was a zipper. "Carter," she breathes. I can feel her swallow breaths.

I zipped her dressed up and took a step back. This is too much tension. I can't take this. The unspoken words hang over us. I turn away and walk away.

"Wait," she yells. It stops me in my tracks but I don't turn around. I wait silently until she speaks again.

"Carter I-" she stops in the middle of her sentence. "Please look at me," she begged. I knew I shouldn't have but I turned to look at her.

She was staring at me, her hazel brown eyes shining like pools of honey. Her hair in her natural curls down to her shoulders. She walks to me closing the distance between us.

"Carter," she put his hands to my face, cupping my cheeks. "I'm sorry I said that yesterday. I got scared. I still don't know what I want from life and that's scary. I need to figure myself out. Find out what I want out of life. I can't do that if you're in my life,"

"I want you to find everything you want out of life. I understand your need to be alone so you can figure yourself out. When you ready I'll be here. However long it takes,"

I can tell she wasn't expecting me to say that. I can see it on her face. She thought by telling me that she needed to find herself that I would run. I'm not running anymore. I'll fight for her until my last breath.

She opens her mouth to say something but Ella walks back into the room. I step away from Adelaide and turn away to face my daughter. "You guys look beautiful. I hope you have a good night,"

"Dad" Ella groaned. I chuckled while walking out of the room, away from Adelaide. It hurts but I know it's for the best.

I made my way into the living room and sit in on the couch. The girls walk down the stairs and I turn my head to face them. They are dressed head to toe in Angel/devil costume. Adelaide looks beautiful so beautiful I want to rush over and kiss her.

I turned my head and faced the TV. "You kids have fun" I screamed. "Call me if you need anything at all," I tried to say with a cold voice.

♡♡♡♡♡♡
Adelaide

He told me he would wait for me. I tried to push him away and he told me he would wait for me. I keep running away from him because I don't want this to be the thing that destroyed me. We both know how this ends But, what he says stays in my mind even now.

However long it takes.

I can't be the one for him. I'm too fucked up. He deserves better. I don't even know what I want. How could he be in love with me when I could never give him what he wanted?

I walked down the stairs behind Ella Carter's eyes fell on Ella and then on me. His eyes go up and down looking at me from head to toe taking me in.

Then his head turns back to the TV. I finally take a breath. Ella looked back at me. "Are you ready?" she questioned with a smile. I nod.

We walked towards the door and her dad yelled. "You guys look beautiful. Have fun," his voice cold and detached. I winced. I never heard his voice like that before. It creeps into my mind and skin leaving its permanent mark on me. It repeats in my mind over and over.

I walked out of the door following Ella and got into her Jeep. I rubbed my hands against my thighs trying to wipe my sweat. I'm freakish nervous. Ella blasted music through the whole car and I tried to let myself get lost in the music.

As we walked into the house the smell of Alcohol and marijuana. I could feel the music vibrate through me. Ella dances her way through the crowd hugging and greeting people. She reached out and I grabbed a hold of her hand.

She led me to the kitchen. Then, I saw him out of the corner of my eye. Asher? I turned my head back to where I thought I saw him but he disappeared. I took a deep breath. I'm just imagining him here. Breath Adelaide.

I took a bottle of liquor poured it into a shot glass immediately put it to my lips. It stings as it goes down my throat. I welcome it. I need to get drunk.

Ella looks at me happily. She probably thinks I'm trying to embrace going out for the first time. I grab another cup and pour another shot. I down it. I cheered. Ella talks to Ethan beside her completely ignoring me.

I took this as a chance to get some air. I walked through the back door into the backyard. It was more quiet outside.

"Wanting some time to yourself?" a voice asks from behind me. I knew that voice. It sent shivers through my body. I didn't even want to turn around but, I had to face my fears.

"Yeah, and I think I had enough so I'll go,"

I tried to walk past him but he grabbed my arm. "You're not going anywhere, Adelaide. Haven't you learned that you are mine?"

"I'm not anyone!" I screamed back at him. He had a smug look on his face like he knew something. This is not good.

"What about Carter Gilmore?" he questions. He knows about us. I need to pretend I don't know what he's talking about. Asher is dangerous and deranged.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I stated. He starts chuckling. He walked towards me and I backed up. Then, my back hit the railing.

"Do you think I'm fucking stupid," he spits. I shake my head. He lifts his hand and pushes my hair away from my face. I winced. A wicked smile on his face. This is not the Asher I met. I'm shivering with fear and trying to hide it.

"Get away from me Asher," I yelled. He lifted her hand and hit me in the head knocking me unconscious.