"Bang Drums"

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Ashton: Hi beautiful :-)

You: May I ask who this is

Ashton: It's your neighbor!

You: Come again?

Ashton: Ashton

You: ??

Ashton: Ashton Irwin? You know, the one who drums a lot

You: Ohhh yeaahh...how the fuck did you get my number

Ashton: Your mom said you can get a boyfriend

You: oh my god

You: no she didn't

You: my mom is so ugh....

Ashton: So what's up?

You: the uselessness of this conversation

Ashton: I can teach you how to drum :-)

You: I don't wanna bang drums I wanna talk to people I actually know

Ashton: I wanna bang you

Ashton: oops did I say that out loud

You: no you typed it

You: wHAT

Ashton: I'm sorry I had to it was the perfect time

You: I should show my mom this conversation

Ashton: please don't

You: I can't anyway she's at work

Ashton: what about your dad?

You: he's at work too

Ashton: So you're home alone? ;-)

You: IM LEAVING BYE

Ashton: Nooooo I was kidding!

Ashton: I didn't even get your name!

Ashton: aww answerrrr

Ashton: okay bye :-(

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