Together

86. Can't wait for tonight

I'm running out of time
Cause I can see the sun light up the sky
So I hit the road in over drive, baby, oh
The city's cold and empty
No one's around to judge me
I can't see clearly when you're gone, oh
-The Weekend

Kiara returns to her home. Shoupe wanted her to wait until JJ came back so he could give her a ride but she declined. There would be no getting out of the conversation about why she was there at this hour if she did and she wasn't ready for that conversation.

Not that they had many other conversations lately anyway. The last three days had been fairly mute from both of them. It's not like Kiara didn't want to talk with him, she actually was dying to be in the same room, it's just she didn't want to be that needy girl that couldn't relax.

It was obvious that there was an elephant in the room and Kiara was the one refusing to acknowledge it.

JJ didn't even know what it was exactly. He'd been taking a back seat and just waiting, it seemed, for her to come around and tell him on her own. He made it pretty clear that he knew something was wrong and he wanted her to talk about it with him.

She needed to get a grip on herself before she could do that. She wanted to be able to say with confidence that she was okay and nothing was wrong. He can just focus on keeping himself the same. That would actually go a long way for her mental state if she were being honest.

She gets showered, letting the hot water become boiling and borderline drying out her skin before she forces her way out. Throwing on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt she heads to her Jeep and drives to school. She sighs, knowing that JJ would be taking his bike.

She forces away the thought of him not wearing a helmet and going faster than he should. She needs to stop thinking like that. It's fine. He's fine.

He can take care of himself. Trust him.

She tried to use the words like a mantra. Shoupe's advice wasn't bad, but she was afraid of owning her own insecurities about his safety and admitting how affected she was. So, she decided to skip to the last step where she just tries to trust him and know that he's going to be safe.

He saw how upset she was in the hospital. It wasn't his fault that she never corrected him in thinking that she was past it. He had no idea she continued to feel that way every day after. 

She parks in the student lot and watches every one head into the school. JJ's bike is already here and so is the Twinkie but she's running late so the rest of the Pogues have already made their way inside. She grips the steering wheel, shutting her eyes and ignoring the intrusive reminder of her nightmare from last night.

The final bell rings and she still hasn't moved.

"Yeah, I can't do this today," she says to herself. She pulls out her phone.

Kiara: Hey can you ditch with me?

She waits for the reply that she knows she'll get. Heart beating a bit faster as her leg bounces in anticipation. She looks backwards not wanting a security guard to sneak up on her and force her into the building. She phone vibrates with the notification.

Sarah: Are you okay?
Kie: Yeah, can you just meet me?

She sees the blue dots come and go a couple times before she actually gets a message.

Sarah: Okay, I'll meet you at your car in ten.

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Kiara wasn't sure what she was expecting when Sarah showed up at the Jeep but her decked out in angel wings, a fitted white crop top with glitter basically covering half her body was not it. She doesn't even have time to protest the herpes of crafting being in her vehicle before Sarah is opening the door and sliding in.