Take A Risk [Englot]

Chapter 1

I was at my desk, working on a spreadsheet, trying to fit everything we had to do in the next few months when our office door opened with a bang.

"Charlotte!"

My boss, Engfa Waraha, strutted towards me with a big smile on her face. Engfa was a great manager. We've been working together for a little bit more than three years now and I was really happy that she was my boss. Her predecessor was an awful woman that drove most of my coworkers and myself crazy, some of us suffered from really bad mental health because of her toxicity. So when Engfa arrived to take her place we all felt relieved and got to feel empowered again. Even though she had been on maternity leave for a couple of months earlier this year, Engfa and I developed a great work relationship since she took the job. We weren't friends nor that close, but we trusted each other about everything work related and I knew that she was a great person in and out. But being the boss made her somewhat distant and she rarely went out with the team. I always yearned to be more than a coworker to her, convinced that we could have been great friends but I understood that she had to protect herself being our manager.

"Yes?" I said turning my chair towards her.

"The board wants to send two employees to the MOMA for a seminar on museum public programs in december. Director Nawat can't go so I asked if you could be my partner for this trip."

"MOMA... as in New York??" I asked, quite shocked.

"Well yes! It's two days of conferences and various meetings. And we have a 10 minutes presentation on our programs here at MOCA." she started to explain.

"Wait, what? We have to present our work? now I was kind of panicking. Only our director or the board members were doing public speaking usually.

"Well who knows what we do better than you? It's your job so you're the most qualified to talk about it!" she answered like this was nothing to be worried about.

"I... I don't..."

"It could be a great opportunity for both our careers, your English is really good, I'll take some classes to get better myself... and it's a trip to freaking New York, Charlotte..." she said with a serious tone.

"You said December, right?"

She nodded, a smile appearing on her face making her dimples pop out. Damn she could be fierce and cute at the same time.

"I'll talk about it with my husband tonight, I need to check his schedule to be sure that he'll be there to take care of Miles while I'm away. Could you send me the details?"

"Yes! And I will ask HR to get us everything we might need for our trip as soon as you say yes." she replied leaving our office like I had already agreed.

When I got home that evening, I spoke about the trip with Mew and Miles during dinner.

"Are you gonna take a plane, Mommy?" my son asked.

"Well yes. Do you remember last year when we took a plane to go to Japan to see Auntie Myma?"

"I remember Nemo, are you gonna watch movies too?"

I smiled at my five years old son. He was always so full of joy. My husband seemed less happy about the trip.

"How long will you be gone?" he asked, sighing.

"Five days, since we have 20 hours to get there and 20 more to come back."

"Is it really worth it? So much time spent inside airplanes for only three days in New York?"

"It's not like I'm gonna go sightseeing. It's gonna be mostly work indoors at MOMA."

"That's even worse!" Mew said quite angry as if I was trying to convince him otherwise.

"But it will be good for my career. Can you block those 5 days in your calendar so I can make it?"

"I'm not happy about it but I'll do it." sighing again.

"Thanks..."

Don't get me wrong, Mew is a great guy. We've been together for almost 17 years now and I know his tendency to worry without ever talking to me about it. Communication was never his forte. And that was mostly what we fought about along all those years. I always knew that we were going to be parents, pretty good ones most of the time, but I didn't know that our relationship will deteriorate with time.

A few years ago my old boss made our lives at work miserable. I always was a little bit stressed out in general but I developed chronic stress and started to have anxiety attacks. Since I couldn't stay like this, I seeked help and found a therapist. Almost four years later now, I was feeling better about work and my anxiety attacks were less painful and occurred less than once per month. But doing all this work on myself made me realize that our married life wasn't as good as before. I tried avoiding looking at it too much, afraid of what I could dig up and what to do with it. But Mew being unable to communicate his feelings made me question myself and what I needed from our relationship a lot. He was a nice guy and a good father, we still had sex and enjoyed it but I couldn't help but feel less connected to him. I felt like he didn't know the real me anymore and that he was on my side less and less. So seeing him almost angry at the opportunity that was offered to me made me quite mad too. I emailed Engfa after dinner when Miles was in bed, telling her that I would go to New York with her. She answered less than a minute after and I could hear her voice in my head as I read her reply, she seemed really happy about it.

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Since you guys loved "You Know You Want Me" and asked for another story, here is something I had in my head for quite some time but I never dared to write. I thought I would give it a try, so I tweaked the characters to fit Engfa and Charlotte personalities a bit more.

Let me know what you think and if you want more ! 🤍