Once Upon a Time in London

Chapter 39

"Tell me to stop and I will"

I stare at him, not the least bit wanting to, "No, don't you dare stop."

I wake up in a cold sweat, heart thumping loudly in my chest. Another dream.

I jump out of bed and reach for the glass of water on the coffee table. Chest rising and falling, I place a hand on my heart, feeling my frantically beating heart calm down to its normal rhythm. I rub my temple, these dreams have become an unwelcome regular occurrence as of late. I'm not even sure what triggers them, only that they leave me feeling guilty and small.

"I'm marrying Zain" I say out loud, not necessarily to anyone. Perhaps I say it to my subconscious, "So please...please stop."

— — — — — —

Regardless of how many years have passed, I have realised that first impressions always matter.

I reach for a pearl earring and watch as it dangles from my earlobe. I take a deep breath.

"Everything will be fine, I'll be fine. It's just orientation week."

I put on some kajal, a little bit of blush and lipstick.

I stare at myself in the mirror, my hair that once fell down to my hips, ends just past my rib cage now. I pull back some of it and pin it in place while the rest falls down in soft waves.

I'm wearing a black button down shirt and a long beige pencil skirt.

I take another look in the mirror and it finally hits me how I'm an adult now, finally entering a career that I had been working so hard for almost all my life. The life that I had always wanted for myself will be mine now. Working at a place I always wanted. I beam in the mirror.

Everything would be okay.

— — — — — — —

I walk in through the glass doors and I'm immediately hit with a rush of people walking all over the place. I wish I could stand and admire the long glass panels or the architecture of the building, however, there is no time. Despite waking up early, I still somehow ended up being a bit behind the schedule I'd planned the night before. I sigh, I need to hurry up or I will truly be late on my first day.

I look around, despite there being so many people, none seemed as if they would be willing to give me directions to wherever this RM204 might be. Everyone was busy doing whatever their own task might be. I pull out my phone to take a look at the directions the orientation pack provided. Although, I wasn't too sure if I'd be able to find the particular room, I was certain I could at least get to the right floor it was situated in.

Right then, I'll just ask for the exact location of the room when I get near it. I'm sure someone would be able to guide me or at the very least, I'd be able to find someone else heading to orientation, I might even be able to make an acquaintance. Excited about the thought, I turn towards the elevators that would take me to the west wing. I watch as a person walks into the elevator, I immediately pick up my pace, if I miss this one, I'll most likely be late.

I've almost made it when the doors begin to close, "Please, hold the doors!" I exclaim and I'm certain that the person makes eye contact with me. And yet, I watch in astonishment as the doors close in my face.

Oh my god. I almost pull my hair but compose myself as I glance down at my watch. It's 8:53am, I need to get there by 9:10am. Screw it, I'll just leg it. 

I pull at the door to the stairwell and try to climb up as quickly as I can. My god, I didn't realise I was so out of shape until now, my side cramps up, I clutch it with my left hand as I use my right to hold onto the railing to hoist myself up these steps. Climbing up stairs in heels when in a hurry might as well be self torture at this point.