~<*>~ Pain in me ~<*>~

Chapter 31

"Are you ready?" Scoups asks softly while he fixes Vernon's black tie. Vernon slowly nods.
"Can you ever be ready to accept your friend's death?" he answers and Scoups only pats his shoulder comforting. A few days ago, when Scoups and Joshua found out about Woojin, the two of them decided to trick him and tell Woojin that there's a funeral for Scoups. But of course they are remembering Jun, and when Woojin arrives, Scoups and Joshua will ban Woojin in front of the whole group. At least that's the plan, but Scoups doesn't know what he will do when he sees that traitor. Luckily, he hasn't told Vernon or Seungkwan yet because they will deffinitely go wild too.
"Are you all right?" Vernon asks confused when he sees Scoups zoning out. The older nods his head and glances at Seungkwan.
"Do you think he can handle it?" Scoups asks referring to Seungkwan and Vernon shrugs. Scoups has stayed here since Jun's death to comfort these two roommates, but out of the three of them, Seungkwan is obviously hurt the hardest. He's oddly quiet, Scoups hears him crying at night and the younger isn't even pretending he's fine anymore. Scoups prays Seungkwan will survive today, but he really understands him. Scoups cared about Jun as well, he was a really close friend of his. The thought that he litterally sacrified his life for him both warms and breaks Scoups' heart. But Seungkwan cared for Jun even more, he lived with him, he was like Dino is to Scoups. Scoups looks down sad when he thinks back about his friend. He can't bear the thought that the brunette might be dead somewhere. Scoups doesn't even know where he is and now that he knows about Woojin, he starts to doubt the whole story as well. 
"You're thinking about Dino, aren't you?" Vernon asks as if he's reading Scoups' mind. The older sighs deeply and nods. 
"I just wish he would've been here", Scoups mumbles, thinking the same about Jun. 
"How dare you say that!?" Seungkwan suddenly yells and Scoups blinks surprised and confused.
"What?" he asks and Seungkwan shoots him an angry look.
"We are preparing for Jun's funeral and you're crying about Dino! Well, guess what? Jun doesn't even have the chance anymore to be here!" he yells angry and tears are already streaming down his face. Vernon wants to say something, but Seungkwan already storms outside.
"I'll be waiting in the car!" he yells and he leaves Scoups and Vernon behind.
"I'm so sorry, it's probably just his sadness", Vernon apologizes, but Scoups shakes his head.
"Seungkwan is right. Today is Jun's day. I shouldn't think about Dino right now", Scoups says and Vernon places his hand on Scoups' shoulder.
"It woudn't kill anyone if you did, though", he says before he too walks away to wait in the car. Scoups takes a deep breath and also walks out. It's time to bring Jun some justice.

When they arrive at the dance room, Scoups starts to feel nervous. Is he sure that he's ready for this? The feelings might overwhelm him and he doesn't know how Woojin will react. Hell, how would the whole group react to Woojin's true identity? And are they even sure about Woojin's evilness? Scoups' mind starts racing out of control, but once again Vernon snaps him back to reality.
"Calm down, take a deep breath. You have to get through this for Jun", he encourages Scoups and the older smiles thankful. Vernon always knows exactly what's going on in your mind and he always says the right things to make you feel better. After taking a deep breath, Scoups gets out of the car and Vernon does too. Scoups suspects they're the last ones to arrive, except for Woojin of course because he got a later hour to keep the surprise. Scoups wants to go inside the dance room, but Vernon's voice behinds him stops his tracks.
"Come on, you already got here! You can get those few meters further." His voice sounds soft, but concerned as well. Only now Scoups notices Seungkwan hasn't gotten out of the car yet and his cheeks are already wet. The poor guy is really hurt by his friend's death. 
"I can't!" Seungkwan yells. "I can't do it without Jun." Scoups sees Vernon lowering his head, but he knows he won't give up.
"And what are you going to do then? Wait here? Go home?" Vernon asks and Seungkwan seems to be a bit taken aback by the question. 
"I uh, I don't know. Maybe go home. I can't be here now, just take me somewhere else", Seungkwan quickly says and Vernon lets a silence of  few seconds.
"And what about Jun?" Vernon asks and Seungkwan widens his eyes startled.
"What do you mean?" he asks careful. Scoups listens to the conversation triggered, he's curious how Vernon will solve this.
"You snap at Scoups for thinking about Dino today, but running away from his funeral is allowed?" Vernon asks and Seungkwan is left speechless.
"Don't let Jun down, Seungkwan. You'll regret it forever", Vernon adds whispering and it seems like the words have gone through. Seungkwan slowly nods and gets out of the car, although he's crying. Scoups smiles, he loves the heartwarming bond between the two and it makes him think about Dino again. One moment, sadness overwhelmes him, but Scoups shakes his head to focus. Dino left him, he has to live with it. Right now, he has to focus on Jun. He still has a lot to make up to his friend. 
"Let's go inside?" Scoups suggests and the three of them enter the building. Nostalgia overwhelmes them while they walk inside. It has been a while since they came here, especially Scoups. Since he went to jail, Scoups hasn't been in this building for a long time anymore, even though it is technically his building. All those memories flash by with all the people who can't be here today. It causes Scoups to feel sad and melancholic. Soon, Joshua's eyes meet Scoups' and the older leaves Vernon and Seungkwan to join his leader. After he quickly scanned the room, Scoups greets his friend.
"Aren't Wonwoo and Mingyu here today?" Scoups asks and Joshua's eyes darken.
"They couldn't make it, even though they really wanted to go." The words tell Scoups that he shouldn't ask further, but he still feels weird about it. 
"Woah, this room feels large now that there are so little people inside", Scoups mumbles after a brief silence and Joshua nods agreeing. 
"We lost so many people, it's making me doubt if this is all worth it", Joshua adds and Scoups can't really deny the leader's words. 
"And to think about the fact the whole reason I banned Jun was to prevent this...", Joshua lets out a sarcastic chuckle, "how ironic." After those words, the four team members go inside their little room behind the dance room, where they always held meetings. Scoups can't stop staring at Jun's picture in the middle of the room. He remembers Woozi laying there, already two years ago. Scoups sighs deeply. Woozi was their first death, he remembers how angry he got when he saw his roommate's dead body. Now he's looking at a picture of a close friend, who he hopes will be the last death. He feels guilty because he doesn't seem to feel so much. Everything is so dull, like his body is getting used to this sadness. Scoups absolutely despises it. 
"When Woojin arrives, will you be able to keep hold of yourself?" Joshua suddenly snaps Scoups back to reality.
"I will try", Scoups answers, but he's not sure what will happen. Before Scoups could even finish his sentence, they all hear a door opening. Scoups gasps, he knows it's Woojin. While he hears footsteps nearing, Scoups keeps a close eye on Seungkwan and Vernon. He knows that from the moment Woojin enters, the truth will be told. And he suddenly isn't that sure if Jun's roommates can handle it. Isn't it better to leave them in that imaginary truth, letting them believe the cops have shot their friend? But Scoups knows it's too late to back down now. The next seconds seem to feel like ages, Woojin appears and smiles sadly while he greets Seungkwan and Vernon. Scoups feels a sudden anger coming up inside him, how dare he? The murderer of Jun is talking to Jun's friends, Scoups can't bear that. Luckily, Joshua puts his hand on Scoups' shoulder to calm him down.
"Try to keep your calm", he demands and Scoups nods, although he does clench his fists. When Woojin turns around and sees Scoups, his eyes glimmer. Scoups notices a glimpse of confusion, but Scoups gets impressed by the speed that Woojin can fix his eyes and pretend like nothing is wrong. He watches as Woojin finally realizes it's Jun's funeral and he walks over to Scoups and Joshua. Scoups fixes his eyes on the blonde, cursing at himself for being so blind. This little moment proved everything, but why has Scoups never seen it before? Suddenly, a memory hits him. He remembers the time Dino accused Woojin of trying to murder Scoups when he fell asleep. Fear rushes past his heart, was Dino speaking the truth at that time? And what if he's in great danger right now? Scoups' thoughts get interrupted by Woojin who waves at him.
"Scoups?" Woojin asks and Scoups blinks surprised.
"I asked you what you were doing here", Woojin asks and Scoups is suprised by that question. Why would Woojin give himself away like that? He could've easily played it off. It does make Scoups' job easier though.
"Just living my life," Scoups answers mad, "are you surprised I'm still able to do that?" He watches Woojin's face turn red and he knows they both know what Scoups is talking about. 
"I...", Woojin tries to defend himself, but Scoups is too angry to let him.
"Next time you try to kill me, make sure it's me before you do it. Now you only piss me off", Scoups spits out and Seungkwan gasps loudly. 
"Woojin, I am deeply dissapointed in you. You're the one I should have banned that day, not Jun", Joshua grits through his teeth and Woojin answers with a nasty look.
"I guess I'm banned too now?" Woojin asks, not even hiding his sweet but fake personality.
"Exactly", Joshua says and Woojin surprisingly grins.
"Too bad, I still have something you want", Woojin says and he suddenly looks at Scoups. Scoups widens his eyes, he immediatly gets what Woojin is talking about.
"Well, he still believes you're the one that died. Let's see how long he will survive in that pity. You should've seen him", Woojin challenges and Scoups absolutely loses it. Before he knows it, he punches Woojin right in the face before Joshua grabs his arm. He knows the red-haired leader has trouble to keep calm himself, but Scoups cannot stop himself.
"You fucking bastard!" he screams and Woojin waves him goodbye before he runs off. Scoups wants to run after him, but Seungkwan is suddenly standing in front of him. Before Scoups can even say anything, Seungkwan slaps him right on the cheek. Scoups gasps surprised and Vernon grabs his arm roughly.
"Is it true!?" he yells angry. Scoups swallows his spit trying not to cry. It is too much, he can't handle this.
"I'm so sorry", Scoups whispers before Seungkwan yells in his ear.
"You could've saved him! Why didn't you save him!? You're a terrible friend! I hate you!" Seungkwan rants and Scoups feels too overwhelmed to say anything in his defense.
"I thought higher of you", Vernon mumbles before he walks away, throwing Scoups on the floor in the process. The older is too stunned to even react, it's like he's only watching the scene happen. Seungkwan runs after him and Joshua walks over to Scoups and helps him get up.
"I'll get after them, can you handle it on your own?" he asks and Scoups nods thankful. Joshua runs away and Scoups is left alone with a picture of Jun staring at him. He feels terrible.
"I know," Scoups whispers to the picture, "I'm a terrible friend."