We're Only Liars // Peterick

☆Two Hopes You Cry Yourself To Sleep☆

*I found a bit of time for this, updates will be really slow, I'm so sorry:(*

Patrick's POV

"Do you think it's too early for names?"

I just sat there, on the bathroom floor. I just sat there, listening to her. I just sat there, wondering what was happening.

"How much do you think a cot will cost?"

Her voice igniting unknown anger inside me, firing and burning in my stomach. My fists clench and unclench, my chest retracts and heaves. I shut my eyes and open them back to the tiled flooring beneath me, I wish I could disappear.

"I hope it's a boy, what do you think it will be?"

Nothing. I want it to be a nothing. I bring my legs into my chest and rest my head on my knees, teeth grit and posed.

"Are you even listening to me?"

My hands tugged through my greasy hair as I tried to get a grip on what reality was. How did this happen? I wanted nothing more than to run away from her and this situation, once again.

I was listening to her, but there's a difference between absorbing it and letting it slip into one ear and out the other. Or maybe just, I didn't want to understand this, I didn't want to believe this. I wanted to pretend that I would wake up any second and everything would be okay, but the burning pain around my wrists told me otherwise and the constant throbbing in my head reminded me that I was awake, awake and alive.

But maybe I am actually dead. Maybe this is what hell feels like, what hell looks like. Maybe this is what I've become, a sinner to suffer for ever and ever. For all my worst nightmares to come true and all my fears to come around and stab me straight in the heart as a punishment for being such a selfish person. Such a terrible person.

But I had so much more to live for, I mean what about our chance to make another album, they will have to replace me as a vocalist or let the band fail. This is all my fault, if I was just that little bit stronger then maybe everything would have been okay.

What about Pete, I never said goodbye, I never got to say how much I'm going to miss him, how much I-

All I took was a sharp pain around the side of my face and a pair of anger stricken eyes to pull me from my thoughts, this really is hell.

I never broke her gaze, I watched her bend down to my level. Her eyes boring back into mine like they owned me, like they could see everything inside me, like they knew everything about me.

"You're not listening." Her fingers played with my hair, running them through the roots and back. A gentle gesture for a not very gentle person. She twisted her tips around strands of my hair, just kept twisting. I could feel my scalp pull as she got tighter and tighter.

But then, she let go.

I watched her expression carefully, unable to read her, like a blank canvas void of all emotion. It was terrifying, not knowing what to think and what to do just in case anything done was wrong, I had no idea what was going through her mind however I could guess it wasn't good.

She never locked onto my glare, fortunately; staring ahead, hands dormant by her sides, shoulders tense yet jaw relaxed. I could read anger yet undeniable calm, that's what scared me the most I suppose, the mix of what ever the fuck I was seeing from her body language. But that's when something unforeseeable happened, she just cracked. In the space of a few seconds, she instantly became this fragile mess sinking to the bathroom floor along side me, her hands screwed up in her hair with tears rolling from her cheeks to the tiles.

She screamed so loudly.

I didn't know what to do, I believed that maybe if I waited for her to calm down then everything would be back to normal, as normal as this gets I suppose, however I couldn't just sit there. It hurt me to see her like that and I wish I knew why. After everything she's done, seeing her this upset is breaking me down with her.

Her tear stricken face met with mine, I grabbed her hand and she gripped so hard back. I missed that, I missed her.

She's still my wife. She's still that princess I fell in love with. I know she is. No one can take that away from me, she is still my everything.

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-shesmywinona27