Lady Dahlia | Loki Odinson

Chapter 37 - Ragnarok

"Surprise." Loki says after the door opens. 

"Your husband's a real dick." Valkyrie tells Dahlia as she walks into the room.

"Husband?" Bruce asks.

"Yes, we got married a few weeks ago." She replies.

"Ow." Loki complains after the can Thor threw at him bounces off his forehead.

"Just had to be sure." He tells him.

"There were nicer ways to do that." Dahlia scolds, poking his arm.

"Hello, Bruce." Loki greets as Dahlia moves around him to undo the chains.

"So, last time I saw you, you were trying to kill everybody. Where are you at these days?" Bruce asks.

"It varies from moment to moment." He answers. Dahlia rolls her eyes.

"He's joking." She assures Bruce as he backs away from Loki. 

"So Sakaar and Asgard are about as far apart as any two known systems. Our best bet is a wormhole just outside of city limits. Refuel on Xandar, and we can be back in Asgard in...18 months." Valkyrie announces. 

"Nope. We are going through the big one." Thor replies, pointing at it through the window with Valkyrie's Dragonfang.

"The Devil's Anus?" She asks.

"Anus? Wait, wait, wait. Whose anus?" Bruce asks, leaving the kitchen area to join them.

"For the record, I didn't know it was called that when I picked it." Thor says. Valkyrie rolls her eyes and walks away to grab a drink.

"That looks like a collapsing neutron star inside of an Einstein-Rosen Bridge." He tells them as he joins Thor in front of the window.

"We need another ship. That would tear mine to pieces." Valkyrie announces.

"She's right. We need one that can withstand the geodetic strain from the singularity." Thor says. 

"And has an offline power steering system that could also function without the on-board computer." Bruce adds.

"And we need one with cup holders, because we're gonna die. So, drinks!" She tells them.

"Do I know you? I feel like I know you." Bruce tells her again.

"I feel like I know you, too. It's weird." She replies.

"What do you say? Uncharted metagalactic travel through a volatile cosmic gateway. Talk about an adventure." Thor says, holding his fist up. Bruce slaps it with his hand.

"We need a ship." Bruce announces. Dahlia gets fed up with trying to undo the chains and breaks them with her magic.

"Thank you, my love." Loki tells her, standing and kissing her cheek.

"There are one or two ships. Absolute top of the line models-" Valkyrie explains.

"I don't mean to impose-" He starts to say. He pulls Dahlia to his chest to protect her from the shattered glass as Valkyrie throws the bottle at the wall behind him. "But the Grandmaster has a great many ships. I may even have stolen the access codes to his security system."

"And suddenly you're overcome with an urge to do the right thing." She scoffs.

"Heavens, no. I've run out of favor with the Grandmaster and in exchange for codes and access to a ship, I'm asking for safe passage through the Anus." He replies. Dahlia rolls her eyes, knowing that he wants to help, but thinks he has to pretend to not want to and betray them first.