Family

THIRTY SIX

This sadness is unbearable

Present || Leonardo

I wake up in cold sweat, my breaths coming out in short strokes. The dark walls offer little comfort, only adding to the anxiety crawling up my throat.

What a great way to start the morning.

Slowly peeling the covers off of my sweat-soaked body, I attempt to tip-toe out of the eerily, quiet room of my father.

A throat clears as my shaky hands near the handle of the door and I swivel around to meet my father's narrowed gaze, staring at me from his en suite bathroom's doorway.

His muscular arms are crossed against his chest, making him look even more terrifying than normal. His cold, grey eyes make my body still in its position, too afraid to even move an inch.

"Where are you going?" He checks his watch," At 5am in the early morning hmm?"

My eyes widen in surprise, I woke up later than usual when I have a bad nightmare.

More like a heartbreaking reality.

"S-School," I managed to stutter out, fiddling with my fingers, anxiously beginning to nip at the skin.

Father's brows furrow and he takes long strides towards me, taking my hands in his," You won't be going to that school anymore."

I swallow down a 'why' and nod my head, avoiding eye contact.

"You'll be attending the same school as Luca, he can protect you if any problems are to occur ever again." Father's jaw clenches, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

My mouth parts in shock and I refrain from snapping my neck up to confirm if what Father is saying is true.

Panic begins to seep into my veins, I can't go to the same school as Luca! He'll hate me even more, he might get other people to bully me. I won't be able to survive. I won't-

Calloused hands gently lift up my face, forcing me to stare into their grey eyes. The usual harshness they've always showed me seems to be fading.

"You will be fine. Nothing will happen I promise." Father speaks softly, almost as if he believes I'll break any second.

We don't doubt it.

"D-Don't." I whisper, pushing myself out of his warm hands," You can h-hit me all you want b-but please, I'm begging you, p-please don't pretend you care." My voice cracks, a tear beginning to make its way down my face.

Letting go of my hands, he crouches down on the floor, meeting my teary gaze with soft eyes.

"I haven't been the best Father I know," He begins," And I'm sorry Leo, I am so so sorry."

"Sorry? For what?" I question, a surge of anger rising.

He abandoned you.

This is all a trick.

He doesn't love you.

You'll never be part of this family.

"Sorry for sending me away? For letting me get beaten up? For blaming me for everything?!" I scream.

"You all made me believe it was my fault, Alonzo told me it wasn't-"

A humourless chuckle echoes throughout the room, cutting me off.

"While I am sorry for not getting you back sooner, you will always be the one to blame for everything. They died because of you."  The softness in his eyes has vanished, grey eyes cold once again.