Devotingly Yours~{Geto Sugaru x Reader}

Ch. 18) A bad break

"Hey! Hey look at me it's alright. i'm alright." I waved the hand he had crushed in front of him, showing that I was fine and that it was only a couple bruises. He easily pushed it away, continuing to rummage and pace around his room.

"I can't fucking believe I got so angry that I hurt you?!" He put his hands on his head finally stopping in the middle of the room.

"You weren't angry at me i know you didn't mean to hurt me, you were just getting upset. It really didn't bother me Sugaru. I promise i'm okay." I rubbed the bruises, even putting a smile on my face to try and calm him. He was still such a mystery.

"Come here. Why don't you sit with me?" I scooted over on his bed patting the spot next to me. He exhaled sharply before slowly sitting next to me.

"I keep hurting you. Whether it's physically or mentally, it keeps happening." He swallowed putting his hand over his mouth. I felt my gut twist. Where is he going with this?

"It was an accident. I-

"No Y/n stop making excuses for me." He raised his voice, causing me to jump a bit.

"But you love me right? You'd never hurt me on purpose..." I felt my voice crack, desperately hanging onto my composure.

"Of course i wouldn't." He paused, shifting towards me on the bed to hold my hands in his. "I love you so dearly Y/n, i'd never hurt you on purpose." He paused again taking a deep breath. "But i think we should take a break until i figure things out. How to be here with you, how to control my anger..." His voice quivered.

"Wait, no. Let's talk about this Sugi."

"I want to be with you, but i'm not good for you right now. It's not fair for me to be selfish with you until i know i can protect you. Even from me." He dropped my hands, looking down at our separated fingers. My heart sank into my gut, and i wanted nothing more than to scream and cry and throw myself into his bed and cuddle with him. But instead i just sighed as a single tear trickled down my face.

"I had a feeling this would happen." I wiped my tear, getting off of his bed.

"I still want to be with you. So please just give me time. Y/n i promise i will get better. I promise. I want to be it for you so bad." He paused grabbing my bruised hand. "Knowing i did this to you kills me. It kills me so much." He gestured to my hand before swallowing, this time letting a tear escape as he kissed my hand.

"I know Sugaru." I could barely speak with the way I was crying. It hurts. It hurts so bad. I swallowed feeling his lips leave my hand.

Suddenly three knocks echoed throughout his apartment, quickly separating us as we left his room.

"It's Nanami." He quickly opened the door revealing the same blonde man from before.

"I wanted to check on you. See if you're alright." Nanami spoke softly to Sugaru, before his eyes quickly moved to me.

"Oh dear. Is everything alright?" He questioned again.

Sugaru looked back at me before turning back to Nanami. "Yeah everything is fine, actually I have a favor to ask of you." He questioned pinching the bridge of his nose. I tried to not cry. I tried so hard as I stood in front of them.

Nanami nodded, stepping inside of Sugaru's apartment.

"Can you take Y/n home?" He questioned, finally looking up. His tears gone now, but his eyes are still watery.

"What? You're not taking me home?" Another stab, landing right in my heart. His eyes lingered on me as he hesitated to answer. He didn't need to answer. I knew.

I nodded, quickly gathering my things before scooting past Nanami to exit the apartment, and absolutely losing it in the stairwell of the building. I don't know what they're doing right now, but I need to get out of here. I'm a mess and probably waking up residents everywhere with the way I was wailing.

"Mrs. Y/n." Nanami's voice was gentle as he slowly approached me.

"I can't breathe." I sobbed covering my face with my hands. I can't breathe. I can't breathe.

"Shhhh don't talk. It's alright. Sugaru explained everything. I'll take care of you okay?" He quickly moved to me, taking me in his arms for a soft embrace. He stroked my hair as I cried. I cried and cried and cried until there was nothing left in me.

"This is only temporary Mrs. Y/n. Sugaru never meant to hurt you." His voice was deep and soft as he spoke. I couldn't think of anything but Sugaru. I need to leave this place.

"Please take me home." We pulled apart, and his eyes took in the features etched onto my face. He nodded, quickly escorting me out of the building. He opened the door to his car for me, before making sure I was situated in the seat.

"Are you hungry?" He questioned as he entered the driver's seat, starting his fancy car.

"No." I folded my arms, shaking a bit from the cold air. He was quick to notice, and quick to shut off the ac as well.

"When was the last time you ate?" He questioned checking his watch for the time.

"I don't know. I can't think right now." I rubbed my head, which was beginning to throb.

"Then you should probably eat." He stated, beginning to pull out of the parking lot. Stupidly, I glanced up at Sugaru's balcony, only to find him sitting on it like he used to when he was a sorcerer. I choked, feeling my nose burn as I began to cry again. I just want to be in his arms.

Nanami parked again, removing his goggles to pinch the bridge of his nose.

I wiped my eyes attempting to stop crying for the fourth time tonight.

"It's alright Y/n. You can cry." His voice was so soothing, and for an odd reason, I felt so safe around him. He reached into his glove box in front of me to pull out a mini package of tissues before handing them to me.

"Just stop using your sleeves to wipe your face." He gestured to the snot filled sweatshirt sleeves now sopping wet.

"It's... It's Sugaru's sweatshirt." I sighed sobbing like a baby.

"Oh dear." He winced.

"Would you like a clean one? It's not a hoodie, but more of a zip up." He pointed to a clean pair of folded laundry in the back seat of his car, two suits hung next to the folded laundry.

"Why do you have laundry in your car?" I sniffled, looking up as I questioned him.

"Dry cleaning dear." He pulled my hand away from my face as I attempted to subconsciously wipe my nose with the hoodie. He held out a tissue, putting that in my hand instead.

"Oh yea, thanks." I took the tissue, wiping my nose before refocusing on the laundry.

"Is it yours?" I questioned.

"It is my laundry..." He stated blankly as he waited for an answer.

"So it's been on you?" I questioned again, looking at his body.

"Okay, ya know what? We should get you home." He paused checking his watch again. "It's getting rather late." He pulled out of park, beginning to drive.

"But you don't know where I live."

"Sugaru told me." He answered not thinking about mentioning his name.

"Sugaru..."

"Yes, Sugaru."

"Sugaru..."

"What would you like to eat? Comfort food?" He questioned as we headed to my apartment.

"I really don't want to eat right now. I feel like i'll throw up if I do."

"Fine. It's late anyways so just promise me that you'll eat in the morning." He held out his pinky, as he turned onto my road.

"Seriously?" I questioned, looking at his pinky kind of in shock.

"It's a promise." He nodded to his pinky, holding it closer to me now. It kind of made me giggle.

"I promise."