jeff, i want to sob in a guy's shirt
he would bury his head in my hair
and he'd suck out all my unlove
and each time i felt unsafe
he would feel in my shaking hands
all my memories
and all my dreams
all the writing that's been thrown away
because it was too late
because i had to work
because it was useless.
he would see that i wrote anyway
at night, just like now
and he would want to see
he would want to read me
he would not understand everything
but he would get the feeling
that i am a unique soul
he would look at our hands
intertwined
and he would feel the fragility
the fear
the need to feel safety
and he would make me feel loved
he would make me feel safe
he would hear and he would read
he would want to help me heal
he would be understanding
and soft
and kind
he would be reassuring.
that's the word.
reassurance.
that's what i'm looking for in a guy's shirt
