Who you see is not who I am

71.

Chosen pov
2days later

Ok guys so it's been about two days since everything happened and I'm not gonna lie I needed space like big time because everything in my life was happening so fucking fast like 7 months ago I was just single now I'm in a full blown relationship

Dealing with 3 people and 3 personalities which I didn't realize how much it stressed me out until now then my mom wasn't making it any better with her constant banter and criticism then my best friends getting in relationships and basically leaving me

I just needed space to think about how I wanted to move forward with everything so after I woke up from spending the night with my dad he ordered breakfast on DoorDash and we talked ate and had a good conversation before visiting time

Aka before my mom came then I was going to go home but something in my heart didn't want to just yet so I went to a hotel by my house and I've been here for about 2 days but I did put everybody in a group chat basically telling everybody what I've been feeling and

That I need time and space I didn't even read any text messages after that I just shut my phone off and I've been chilling in this hotel room for days just deep in my thoughts I have been to the park to get some fresh air and to the mall to get clothes but that's about it

*knock knock knock* what the fuck I made a face because I ate 20 minutes ago so that can't be room service and nobody knows where I am so I got up and without thinking I open the door to come face to face with my best friend who's supposed to be back home states away

"What the fuck is wrong with you I was in my fucking bed 2 days ago chilling just for you to put me in a bogus ass group chat basically cutting out the world then you fucking cut your phone off so nobody can reach you bitch are you fucking insane

What if something would have fucking happened to you dumb bitch you turned your location off and disabled all your social media accounts what if you would have ideas nobody would have been able to find you"

I just looked at Bebe I'm shocked "how did you find me" making her shut up and look at me in disbelief then I guess once she got herself together she flinched at me like she was about to hit me "your bracelet you asswhole" I nodded

Because me and Bebe go these bestie bracelets when she told me she was moving and they vibrate when you at them it's the cutest thing ever but now I know they have a tracker in them

"So you caught a flight just to make sure I was ok" she looked at me with pure disgust and barged past me into the room then sitting on my bed "yeah you dumb bitch you was fucking talking crazy saying that your life wasn't going right

That you were to stressed out and that you were spiraling I thought you were gonna try and fucking do it again and I don't care how you feel about anybody right now even me you are not leaving me you don't get to"

I chuckled "but you left me" she looked at me with her eyebrows raised and said "that's what this is all about because I moved" I shook my head "no" she looked at me and stood up getting in my face

"Chosen Trinity Thompson I've been your best friend since before we could talk I know you like the back of my hand and we are as close and close can fucking be and you will not one word answer I did not spend 300 dollars on a plane ticket to get bullshit fucking tell me what is wrong with you NOW"

"UHHH FINE yes it's because you moved you moved and fucking left me when you know you were all I had and I hated your finance because he's the reason I don't have you anymore but I didn't say anything because you deserve to be happy

So I didn't tell you how much it hurt me,or how many nights I cried,or even the thought of me loosing all my progress in everything and coming with you but I knew you wanted space with your man so I kept quiet and it's so painful but it's not all about you"

She looked at me angrily "why the fuck didn't you say anything I would have never left if I knew it would hurt you and you know this" I shook my head "I was trying to be a good friend for the first time but now I see that even me trying to do good back fired"

She huffed "you were always a good friend Chuchi yes a little unstable and unhinged but that wasn't your fault but I always accepted you for you and I love you for you no questions asked and it really hurts me to know you felt like you couldn't talk to me"

I huffed "I was gonna talk to you I was gonna talk to everybody I just needed space to think I was so stressed out and I didn't know what to do and I felt old me coming back out and I didn't wanna loose anybody

I love you,my relationship,Nai,my momma,my brother and I just knew if I needed to get better I needed time and space to really sit in my thoughts and go over what I was about to say

And I know when I go back not everybody is gonna be there is be forgiving but at the end of the day I had to make sure I was cool and I know I sound selfish but I was loosing myself again and if they can't understand then I'm sorry"

She looked at me for a minute and said "Chosen who do you think ain't gonna be here because everybody is waiting for you the only reason everybody didn't send a search party is because your dad give to give you a second

But now I hope you got enough space and enough time to think because we are going home start packing your shit"