begin again | woosan (✓)

- ninety nine -

tw / very very brief mentions of past abuse

it took a couple of weeks getting used to the fact that hongjoong and seonghwa had graduated, and that when the rest of them returned to school the following semester, the eldest two wouldn't be there. wooyoung was doing better than anyone expected adjusting to things, but that didn't mean everything was going perfectly. he had quite a few nightmares over the course of the two weeks following the boys' graduation, finding himself sleeping in seonghwa's bed or in between hongjoong and seonghwa (when hongjoong was over at their apartment) more often than not.

this particular day marked three days since his last nightmare, which was a good feeling for wooyoung. it had been nearly every night he found himself unable to sleep without waking up in a panic, rushing into seonghwa's room and clinging to the older, so three days was an accomplishment.

he had fun plans today, going with san to the pottery cafe they had gone to for the date that had made them official nearly a year before. things were so different than the last time the two had gone, so wooyoung was a little nervous about how it would feel.

he was in the middle of getting ready, yeosang laying on the boy's bed to keep him company.

"do you think i should wear earrings with this?" wooyoung asked quietly.

"that'll look pretty! which ones?"

"mm... maybe the hoops? i don't think i want it to be anything too much."

"oooo, yes, wear those! san will love them."

wooyoung giggled at this, nodding before putting them on.

"thanks sangie~"

"of course, youngie... are you excited?"

"mhmm... we went to this cafe when he asked me out, a-and it's almost been a year since then. it feels really good... everything with san feels really, really good."

"i'm really glad... you deserve to feel good about your relationship, baby. you deserve to feel good about yourself and this life of yours too, and i know that san has been a really huge help in allowing you to feel that way."

"he has," wooyoung nodded in agreement.

"that makes me so happy, youngie," yeosang whispered, his eyes lined with tears.

"sangie... don't cry..."

"i'm sorry, baby... i just never thought i would see you so happy again... i was scared, y'know? that fucking minhyung had broken you beyond repair... a-all i wanted was for your light to shine again. i-i didn't know how to help, i-i just knew i had to keep you here with me. i couldn't lose my best friend, no," yeosang shook his head, letting his tears fall.

"you're never going to lose me, sangie... you and hwa... you two are what kept me holding on for so long, you know that? even on days where i didn't think i could do it, even on days where i was so sure i wouldn't make it through, you and hwa were there. you held me up and kept me from drowning... you protected me from all that you possibly could, even before i finally left that monster... a-and i'm sorry if you ever doubted your ability to protect me..." wooyoung explained, sitting down next to the boy and resting his head on his shoulder.

"baby... don't apologize, no..."

"sangie, i have to. i know it happened. i know you've felt like you failed at protecting me, the same way hwa has. neither of you failed. i just didn't listen... i didn't want you to be right about him. even when i knew i was wrong, i still wanted to be right. i ignored every warning, every single observation that you had made. i ignored the help you and hwa tried to give me while i was in that relationship, and i faced the consequences."