(WARNING: +18)
***
Shawn's POV
April 15, 2023
Don't panic. Don't panic. Everything will be alright. Everything will be... Oh, God. What the fuck have we done? We managed to find a way to screw ourselves up even more.
How I wish I could slip away and pretend this didn't happen, but it has and I've been transfixed watching her asleep, tangled in the sheets, so still she looks like she's passed out. She looks beautiful, anyway... My girl, mi vida, my curse.
What am I going to do when she wakes up? Kiss her good morning? Offer to take her home or...? No, that would make her feel rejected and I'm not willing to do that. I would die happy with her in my arms, but this is so wrong.
"Are you guys back together? Are you together?", I don't know. I don't know anything. I'm so confused.
I have to take a deep breath because this is going to be very hard, really. More so than the day I decided to leave for the best, for us. Was it the best for us? We're back here, so I guess not... We're so stupid.
I think about all this as my headache worsens and tension paralyzes my muscles, unable to move an inch from this bed, away from her, whom I hear breathing softly, with her bare back turned to me and all her tousled hair falling over her pretty angelic face. I am tempted to touch her, but I stay still, barely remembering bringing her to my room when she fell silent and I noticed her completely asleep just after she promised me that everything would be all right.
Once again, I hope so.
I laugh incredulously, kinda surrendering to whatever the universe wants of us, and allow myself to relax a little, but my heart races and my panic kicks back into overdrive as soon as Camila stirs in her sleep, slowly opening her eyes from under the thick layer of hair she shakes off and finally pinning her gaze to the ceiling with a confused frown on her face. Then she yawns adorably and turns in my direction, with more panic in her eyes than I feel myself.
- Shit! - She jumps up, grabbing the sheets around her to cover herself immediately like I hadn't seen her in all her splendor a few hours ago.
- Hi. - I really don't know what else to say.
Camila's eyes go from looking at me with surprise to embarrassment to concern and back to panic, almost hiding from me as she moves as far away as she can without falling off the edge.
- I thought it was just a dream. - She mumbles, shaking her head in disbelief and groaning uncomfortably at the mere movement, so she has to stop, closing her eyelids tightly.
Even though I'm not feeling well at all, I don't like to see her in bad shape, so I gather what energy I have left and pull on a pair of sweatpants within reach to quickly fetch aspirin from my bathroom. Camila stares at me as I return to her, looking so tiny on the huge white bed that it makes my heart race so fast my chest aches, I don't know if it's because of the old memories or because this might never happen again.
- Here you go... - I hold out a glass of water with the pill.
Camila keeps her eyes on mine for what feels like an eternity before receiving the items from my hands, making sure to hold the sheets under her arms. I take a seat on the other side of the bed, breaking eye contact and pretending to be more curious about my phone than what's going through her mind.
- I needed it... I drank so much, my God. - She whispers so softly that for a moment I think she's talking to herself. - Thank you, Shawn.
- No worries. - I try not to freak out when she says my name like that, so sweet and lovely... compared to the raw fierceness and passion of last night.
YOU ARE READING
Traces Of The Past - (Shawmila, The Story) Vol. III
Fanfiction"I don't have the slightest damn idea what will happen from now on.... What I can be sure of is that I will always be by your side when you need me. You can always count on me as a friend. I promise you that." - Shawn. Recovered from the time capsul...
