untouchable ♡𝅼

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏ Jisoo is not you

❀ Lisa ❀

I didn't talk to anyone that day and tried not to look around either. I didn't want to see them together; I didn't want to feel that ache in my chest when I saw the way she looked at Jisoo.

Maybe it was just my imagination, but after watching for so long, and putting modesty aside, I always knew what she meant with a look. Always.

But there was something that could tell me I was wrong, that they weren't really a couple, that she didn't like her. 

It was the fact that I had never seen her give that look to anyone or anything else.  Basically, she acquired that look when she touched her, that extra sparkle. And it might all be in my head, it might just have been longing or a deep friendship, but who says my mind thinks that way?

 All I think is that I want her and that she might like someone else. I know, I know, maybe I'm torturing myself for nothing, but I can't think any other way. I just can't. 

I've been staring at the dorm ceiling for hours. It seems to change color with every step, every minute. Maybe I'm going crazy over her, maybe I'm in love for the first time in my life. That sounds ironic. Very ironic.

 "Can I call you an idiot one more time?" Mingyu threw himself onto the bed next to me, running gel through his hair and slicking it back. 

"Seriously, are you not going to cut that hair?" I raised my eyebrows. 

He had started growing his hair out the previous year and hadn't cut it since, and now it reached his shoulders. But for someone who always knew him with short hair, it looked strange. I thought it was strange.

 "Shut up!" he sat on his own bed. "When are you going to talk to her?"

 "I'm not, and I'm not explaining why again!" I looked back at the ceiling, just wanting to stay lost in my thoughts. 

"Have you thought that if she liked Jisoo that much, she would have put her trust in her cousin and not in you?" he sighed heavily. 

"You don't understand..." I got up.

 "I understand more than you!" he huffed, impatient. "You're blind, blindly in love! Try to understand once and for all, Lisa! Jisoo is not you!"

I was walking through the halls. That Saturday, the boarding school was practically empty because it was snowing and we were going to the village the next day. Most people were taking the day to warm up or do the tasks for the next week. But I was there, completely forgetting about the chemistry assignments I had written down in my notebook. All I could think about was what I would do from now on, if I would keep looking at her.

 "Finally, I found you!" I turned around to see who was talking to me and found Somi. She smiled. "You disappeared, huh?"

 "I disappeared?" I raised my eyebrows.

 "Anyways! Let me get you to the point! What are you and Mingyu up to these days? I can't find you anywhere!" she put her hands on her hips. 

"Have you thought about looking in the library? We have Suneung this year, you know?" I mocked, and she frowned as if suspicious. "What is it?" 

"Well, it's just that... he asked me out, remember?" she made an angelic face. I nodded, motioning for her to continue. "And well, I don't want to wait around for nothing, so I want to know if..."

 "If the invitation was serious and if he expects you to go with him?" I gave a small smile. "Honestly? You two will kill each other if you go out together!"