Classroom of the Revenge

V2 - Chapter 6: Hopeless Lives

Cold. Hot. Cold. Hot. Cold. Hot. The feelings repeated again and again, plaguing the mind of the victim. Cold. Hot. Cold. Hot. Cold. Hot. It seemed like it was the only sensation that registered in the mind of the victim. The cold. The hot. Nothing else.

"—, please help!"

But no response.

"Please!"

Again, no response.

It seemed like the words were drowned in a great ocean, repressing all sounds that tried to escape.

All alone. They were all alone. In the dark abyss, they were all alone.

Helpless? Helpless. Scared? Terrified. Lost? Forever. Forgotten? Forgotten. Painful? Always. Hopeful? Never. Real? No idea.

Falling. Falling. A new sensation. An old sensation.

Flare. Pain. Gone. Forever. Never.

What is real? Whatever you decide.

* * * * *

"—gone. He was gone. He was gone. They were gone. They were. They are not. They will not be. Forever. And ever. And ever, they will. That is the truth. The truth. The truth, forever and ever."

* * * * *

White. I was alone. Alone. Alone again.

Sick. I felt sick. I wanted to vomit, but I couldn't. Nothing could come out anymore. I laid in my bed staring at the ceiling, unmoving. Even moving felt like a herculean task. Like one small movement would drain the rest of my life away in an instant.

The incessant knocking returned. How many times did this happen now? I didn't feel like looking through my memory to check. I simply laid in my bed, ignoring whoever was at the door. Then, like clockwork, the talking began.

"Ayanokoji!" A stupid sounding voice spoke to me. "Look, I get that what you saw was pretty traumatic, but it's not as if you knew the person."

I didn't respond. I wouldn't respond. I couldn't respond.

"Look, the class is really worried about you. I am too. Even though we only talked that one time about Horikita, I still consider you a friend."

Silence. Permeating silence.

Then, the stupid liar left. I was back to peace and quiet. I suppose it is more accurately quiet than peaceful.

I felt a pain in my gut. When was the last time I ate? I didn't feel like remembering. I simply drifted. Drifted along through my thoughts. Like a slow wave coming to shore, slowly accumulating.

How long has it been? When was the last time I...I stopped myself. I should think of something else. Just thinking about it caused an unpleasant feeling to well up in my chest.

And so I continued drifting. Following the wind of the seas that was my mind.

* * * * *

The boy walked along with the roommate and the girl as they all talked about various things.

"You know," the boy began. "I never understood why Edmond Dantès was so obsessed with obtaining revenge. You get me?"

The girl thought for a moment before saying "if you were harmed I would seek revenge for you."

The boy smiled and said "is that so? Could it be that I never had anything taken away from me? Is that why I don't understand?"

"Probably," the roommate said with his impassive look.

"You know what I never understood," the girl began, "why Raskolnikov thought himself so superior to others."