Hollowness

Chapter 42

Zayn's Pov

Scarlet's driver dropped me at my apartment. our bodyguard's were already there to guard the apartment door. John opened the door. He was disheveled and tired. 

" Where were you, Zayn? Rose gave me a hard time sleeping the whole night. She was crying a lot. She was asking for her dada." John asked tiredly.  My heart raced after listening to him. 

I kept quiet and entered inside. My head was throbbing. While removing my shoes I felt myself losing my balance. John immediately grabbed me by the arm.  His hold was tight on my arm so I winced in pain. John saw my painful expression and he was immediately alert. He straightened and looked at my face trying to analyze me. I could not meet his gaze. 

" Zayn.." He whispered and without saying anything further he took me to the guest room.  He made me sit on the bed and immediately went to the bathroom and turned on hot water. He came back from the bathroom and kept his hand on my shoulder lightly.  I flinched and tried to control my breaths. 

" I have made a bath for you. Please wash yourself. meanwhile I will prepare something to eat for you"  He said softly. I looked at him and wanted to ask him about the rose. Before I could ask him; he said" She is sleeping now." 

I nodded and went to the bathroom.  I was grateful to John. He understands me well. He has always tended to my wounds. I am thankful for his strong support. I did not imagned that there would be a day where John will again have to tend to my wounds. 

I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. It was having Deja vu. 

Again I am violated and taken against my will 

Again I can see my bruised body 

Again I feel disgusted 

Again I feel hands roaming over my body like thrones pricking my skin. 

I am getting better with rapes. This time I kept my eyes closed the entire time and did not see her face. I felt like laughing at my own jokes. I looked at myself in the mirror to see a broken boy. Empty eyes. Pale skin. I should thank scarlet. Compared to Eva and Mel she was less violent.  Irony of my life is now I have to wonder who is the best rapist of all who has raped me. I am comparing which one is better than the other.  A sob escaped my throat. I turned on the shower and slid down on the floor. I screamed, cried and thrashed, I never wanted this fate. Why destiny keeps on giving me things I don't want. I have never asked for big things in my life. I wanted a simple life. 

I don't know how long I sat in the shower and cried. John came and stopped the shower.  He draped a towel on my body and made me stand up. He slowly pulled me in the room and made me sit on the bed. I let him dry me and put clothes on me.  He brought hot soup for me to drink. I did not feel like eating. I pleaded with him to leave me alone and sleep. He caressed my hair and looked at me with sadness in his eyes. I pulled him in a hug and sobbed in his chest. He soothingly patted my back. He wiped my tears. 

" Zayn, sleep now. I don't know what happened to you but from what I see I assume the worst thing has happened. I am always with you. You have to be strong for Rose. Just imagine her face and endure my son. We will have to navigate through this and create our own path. Till then please be strong my child" John's tender words soothed me. I nodded and moved to sleep. 

I was having flashes of scarlet's torture. Her breath, lips and hands all over my body. I could feel the pain she brought on me. Mostly her threat to make me public property. It did not seem like a threat to me. She said as if she made a promise to me that she will destroy me. I was sweating and shivering in my sleep. After some time I felt soft hands caressing my cheeks. I opened my eyes to this feathery touch. Rose was sitting next me; patting my cheek. She was smiling at me.

" dada... miss u.." She mumbled.  I could not control myself and hugged her. I cried a lot. She wiped my tears. She was frowning at me. Her innocence made me overwhelmed with different emotions. 

" No cry..dada.. No cry.." She said, tilting her head. Rose pulled my lips up with her fingers. 

" Smile... Smile.... dada smile..." Rose said, smiling at me. 

I smiled at her. John is right. I have to be strong for Rose. Back then I was alone but now I have a life dependent on me. I must live. 

Authors Note: 

Rose made Zayn smile. What do you think ? Is Rose Zayn's weakness or strength? Find out in the next chapters..

Happy reading!