Surviving High School.

chap.73

"Look at me." I refused to listen to a word he said. If he hadn't been blocking the door, I would've long walked out of this classroom. On the other hand, I need to eat and take my medication but I can't do that seeing as how my food is in my locker. "Yandisokuhle please." From the corner of my eyes, I see him approach me. 

"You stay the fuck away from me Majola. You made it loud and clear that you want nothing to do with me or our child." I whispered the last bit. He wordlessly pulls me into his arms and I thrash around and try to push him away. "That was my father and mother, not me. I never said I want nothing to do with you and our child." He really smells good and it's been so long since I've been held like this. I could feel myself melt in his arms. 

"No Ntando. You chose to keep quiet. You didn't defend me and you allowed your father to speak badly to my family! I can't do this with you Ntando, let me go." I pushed him away from me but he pulled me right back into his arms. "I am sorry. Yandisokuhle I'll spend my entire life proving to you just how sorry I am." 

That melted my resolve a little bit. "Fine, I will give you one last chance Ntando. Don't make me regret it." He smiles at me and I can't help but smile back. "Now move, I want to fetch my food. Your child is making me super hungry." He winces at that, "Please, don't say that. Rather, refer to it as Baby." I can feel the confusion coating my face. "You never know who's listening." I nod, even though that makes me feel some type of way.

"Now, I remember asking you not to call me Ntando yet you keep doing so. Why?" He pulls me into his arms and I had to catch my self by placing my hands on his hard chest. Gosh I forgot just how hard it is. "Because you make me so angry Anande." He kisses my forehead and the tears just fall down my face. "Don't cry. It hurts when I see you crying." He wipes my tears off my face and I can't help but laugh lightly. 

He picks me up and places me on the near by desk, standing in between my legs. His cold hands trail up and underneath my skirt. "Anande what are you doing?" My heart races and my breath catches in my throat. "I can't get you more pregnant now, can I?" I shake my head. fearing that my voice won't come out. I gasp when his fingers touch me there. 

My body involuntarily shakes as his fingers work magic in me. He catches my short pants and moans into his mouth, silencing me while bringing so much pleasure to me. I grab onto the table when I feel like I want to scream out loud, my thighs twitch and try to close to stop this feeling but he holds strong and moves his fingers at a fast pace, just when I feel like I'm about to let it all out, he pulls his fingers out and I gasp in shock.

"Anande..." I find myself whining and wanting more. I hear his belt buckle click and the sound of a zip before he pulls me to him and we both moan aloud. It all happened fast but it was so fulfilling. By the time the lunch bell rings, we are both cleaned up and ready to go to our next classes. 

"Same time, same place tomorrow?" I laugh at his question but nod either way. I rush to my locker to get a bite out of my lunch before rushing to the gym. When I get there, almost everyone has changed into their gym clothes so I rush to the locker rooms to go change. I refuse to think much about it as I change but when I leave the locker rooms, I have my tummy tucked in and my blazer on.

"You can't be wearing your blazer Yandisokuhle, it's not gym appropriate." I sigh, "I know coach but I'm feeling cold." Someone shouts out from the gym, "running will get your blood warmed up stupid!" Everyone erupts into laughter and instead of crying about it, I simply smile, nothing will ruin my mood! I take my blazer off and ignore everyone while we do the whole gym exercises and what not. 

People will always talk, I know that but me knowing that doesn't mean what they say hurts any less. Now I actually can't wait to stop attending but at the same time, I'm scared that if I stop, it will mean my life is over. I am too conflicted for this lab work. Who thought it would be fun for learners to practice with chemicals? Although, it is interesting to see how elements mix and create something new.

The shame, however, is that I am not focusing on this. Argh! I raise my hand and Hergelat comes to mine and my desk mate's table. "Yes Miss Mthethwa." I take the rubber gloves off my hands. "May I please be excused?" He sighs and somewhat rolls his eyes. "Yes you may. The permission slip is on my desk. Be back before ten fifty five." I looked at the clock on the wall and it read ten forty. "Yes sir."

 I walked in the hallways until it was time for me to get back to class, that's when I rushed back to class. When I got back, they had moved on to the 2nd experiment. "Come here Miss Mthethwa." Hergelat called me when class was over, just as I was about to leave class. "Yes sir?" I came to stand before his desk. 

He took his glasses off and se them aside. "I will continue to supply you with your school work once you leave. Your father asked me personally to oversee all your work. I trust that you will work with me Miss Mthethwa. I know you don't want all your family's work to go down the drain because of your selfish acts." 

I nod. "Good, that's all." I nod again then walk out of his class and to my next one.  By the time 5pm comes around, I am beyond the words exhausted and with all this piled up homework that I need to do, I just want to get to my bed and sleep but I know I can't quit now in the early days. Since I had to quit being a drum majorette, I took up library studies which basically teaches you about the history of the school as a whole.

It is as boring as it sounds but I have no choice. I can't put any more stress or dirt on my family name. Just  waiting for the media to find out or rather, trying to find a nicer way for the media to find out is stressful. Here I am, sitting on the bleachers feeling more alone than I have in my entire life. 

I know I said I wouldn't cry but right now, all I want to do is cry. "Hey, can I sit here?" I turn to my right and it's Simukelisiwe. "Hi, you're Buhlebendalo's sister right?" she nods, "Yeah, sure. You can sit. It's a free country." She smiles and sits down. We sit in silence for a while, "So..." I begin the chat.

"I'm nothing like my sister." I can't help but laugh at her statement. "No I know. You're nicer." She smiles, "thank you for that. I guess I really needed to hear that." We watch the sun set in quiet. "It's getting cold and my brother is running late. Argh! I can't believe this, I'm going to get sick." I see Simukelisiwe nodding on the side. "well, at least your brother is running late, my sister chose to leave me here as a form of punishment." My head turns so fast, "Wh-whh-what!" That comes out much more louder than I thought it would.

She nods, looking to the side. "Well that's...that's..no man! That's wrong. Why does she do that to you? Have you...have you tried to talk to someone about it?" She shakes her head, no, while wiping her tears. "It's not like they would believe me. No one ever believes me so I have long stopped trying to get them to believe me ." I pull her in for a hug.

"Argh man! I'm so sorry that you have to go through such. Maybe God is preparing you for brighter things in future." She laughs out loud at that. "Wha-why are you laughing?" She sobers up. "There isn't a God. If He truly did exist, my life wouldn't suck this much and my parents would still be alive-"

"Yandisokuhle woza! Kunini sikufuna! (Come on! We've been searching for you!)" Nkosinathi stood at the bottom of the bleachers. "Come, let's go." I took Simukelisiwe's hand in mine and we walked silently to my older brother's car.