welcome to trench

i am clancy

"he's never calmed down that quickly"

she smiles at me nervously and exits the tent, im sat with my thoughts, who is clancy, what was that what does she mean 'calmed down', how could that be tyler, why is nobody telling me anything, why didnt anyone help-

before i can spiral any further, josh walks in, his face visibly stressed out, he sits down, i cross my arms "care to explain" i say a little agitated

josh sighs letting his head hang "i...i can't"

i start to get more pissed by the second "what do you mean you can't?" i say trying to hold in that im actually pretty mad

"its...he has to do it...explain" he mutters still not looking at me "who,tyler?" i ask "mhm" he nods

"okay fine" i say and angrily stand up "wait!" he grabs my arm "just..go easy on him, he's upset" he mutters "dont be be mad at him"

i pull my arm back "im not mad at him! im mad at you people,nobody will tell me anything" i scoff and walk out of the tent

my head is blowing with questions but im trying to calm it down for tyler, he did seem really upset,i haven't never seen him cry like that

i make my way towards our tent, on my way everyone is looking at me weirdly, not mad, not scared just...different, i feel so strange but just march straight towards our tent

when i reach it i take a deep breath and go in but its empty, nobody in there, im about to run out again but i notice a little note on the bedside

i sit down and pick it up,

y/n

i didn't mean to scare you, i hope i didn't
im sorry you had to see that and be there
i can't be around right now, im back out by the creek, please don't show this to josh, he we will be even more worried and come looking for me,
please don't be scared of me

tyler.

i put the letter down and sigh, im even more confused, he thinks im scared of him, im obviously not, just very confused

i bury my head in my hands and squeeze my eyes shut, i sit there for a moment but eventually get up, stuff the note in my pocket and rush back to josh

hes still sat in the same position, a little shock of fear in his eyes when he meets mine "im gonna go walk to clear my head" i say

he looks like he's forming something to say but ends up with a simple "okay"

i nod and head out

i walk around for a while trying to find my way back to the creek, i hike over the side of a hill, and it keeps getting steeper but its a faster way

out of breath i force my legs further up the hill, i didn't notice the rock was that lose and i slip while it rolls from underneath me

i tumble down a bit "fuck" i mutter and look at my bleeding knee, another pair of messed up pants, great

i crawl back up and sigh forcing myself over the hill

i put my hands on my hips catching my breath, i see the creak in the distance and fasten my pace, i look around but no sight of tyler

i bite my lip and walk further, limping the slightest bit because of my throbbing knee

i suddenly see someone lying down in the grass in the distance

"tyler?" i say worriedly, he shoots up snapping his head around, he seems to relax in the slightest bit when he sees me

i slowly walk towards him sitting down next to him cross legged

he has scratches on his face from his fingernails and his eyes still look bloodshot, he's not looking at me

im not sure what to say not wanting to startle him
"tyler how are you feeling" i say nervously

he immediately shifts his gaze to me "are y-you scared?" he asks sounding on the verge of tears

"what? no,no im not" i assure him shaking my head

his hand reached up to his hair furiously tucking on it, "stop that" i say and take his hand taking it down squeezing it softly

"im not scared okay, i promise" i say looking him right in his eyes "mhm okay" he mutters

"can you...try and explain what happend" i ask still holding onto his hand

his bottom lip shakes a bit "its hard" he mutters again looking at me but immediately looking away "i cant..l-look at you"

i take a deep breath "you don't have to" i say and lay down "we can just look at the sky" he shakily lays down next to me

"i can't explain...everything because i just don't-...don't know"

"thats okay" i assure him

"what you saw was...someone else, my other half, blurry, whatever you wanna call it, its not me, please believe me in that, im not in control when...when that happens"

i listen carefully and take up all information i get

"something shifts in me, i usually get stuck for hours...until well.. you.....but y-yeah anyway its like a switch turned on"

"usually josh gets me out or after some sort of force i snap out but it keeps coming back, and well, he can be...off putting in lots of ways"

"do you...remember anything that happens?" i ask

he stays silent for a moment

"its like im watching it from a screen and someone else is pushing the buttons" he mutters

"tyler...i don't even know what to say that sound absolutely horrible to experience..." i say truthfully scared for him

"its okay, its been happening for years, i just...pretty much everyone is scared of me, i just really don't want you to be"

"im not, im not scared of both of you okay, is there anything i can do to help you"

i say trying to convince him im not scared

"i don't know...i never talk to anyone about it, except josh"

its silent for a bit

"tyler can i ask you something" i say

"yeah" he mumbles

"you called yourself clancy...what does that mean, like the facility?"

he sighs "well" he mutters

"i am clancy"