welcome to trench

distance

"it'll be fine"

after some time sketching i shut the notebook and decide i have build up the strength to talk to tyler and figure this out

i get myself up and make my way back to camp

before i can reach my tent josh hurries to me and stops me in my tracks "stop wait" he breaths, i stop and cross my arms "yes?"

"he uhh...you can't go see him" he says nervously, i raise my eyebrow "and why's that" i scoff

he gives me a face "come on...don't take it out on me" he says, i roll my eyes "this is ridiculous"

he nervously runs a hand through his hair "he just-well uh...just, not right now" he mutters again

i sigh and look away "you can come help me for dinner!" he hurries and drags me away, "we can peel the potatoes" he smiles

"yeah fine whatever" i say and sit down grabbing a potato "oh cmon" he pouts "don't be angry with me" he says nudging my knee

"im not" i say "well you don't seem very sunny either eh?"

i sigh again "why does he not want to see me?" i say and there falls a silence

josh runs another hand through his hair and sits back but before he can answer i can see tyler walk by in the distance

he has his hood up and his hands buried in his pockets, when he notices i see him he paces away

i bite my lip "give it some time" josh mutters

i shake my head and peel another potato in silence, the whole time we're cooking up dinner its silent only the sound of things being picked up and put down is filling the space

when we're done its starting to het dark and josh calls everyone together, he's scooping up some dinner for everyone

i sit a little further from the campfire and watch everyone grab a plate, its now pretty much dark out and everyone is hurdled in little groups eating, i bring my knees up to my chest and watch the fire burn

josh approaches sitting next to me with two plates "im not hungry" i say not breaking my eyes from the fire

he sighs "come on" he nudges me "you haven't eaten all day" he says, i don't say anything and just push the plate away

i suddenly feel an overwhelming sadness and my stomach is twisting in knots

i take a shaky breath and my eyes get a little teary, i can see josh noticing in the corner of my eye, he quickly puts away his own plate turning to me

"whats wrong?" he asks with a concerned look on his face "nothing" i whisper still not looking at him

"well...you know im quite sure there is" he says

i shrug quickly wiping my face "you can tell me, it will stay between us" he says softly gripping my shoulder, i turn to look at him and back at the fire

"its fine really" i say

he mutters something "okay...i dont believe that but i wont push, just please eat something okay?"

"mhm" i mutter, josh sighs "i get it il just leave you alone-

"no don't" i hurriedly say, he furrows his eyebrows in surprise "oh...are you sure?"

"yeah, we can just i don't know 'small talk' or whatever" i shrug

he laughs "yeah ofcourse" he says

"so, medical in dema? how was that" i ask "or is that like, i dont know weird to ask" i ramble

"no no you're fine" he says "it was well, definitely something i will never forget" he says

"i mostly took care of people that were caught doing something they weren't supposed to and got punishment"

"that sounds horrible" i mutter

"yeah but i also got to make them better and in the end they also helped me get out" he says smiling

"that is great yeah you're right" i nod

"how about you?, did you have a whole plan? or just went for it only if you want to answer! no pressure or anything!"

he quickly rattles

"i had a plan this time" i laugh

"and it honestly went great, didn't get caught and it went pretty smooth considering the tyler thing" i say

he raises an eyebrow "tyler thing?"

"he tried to escape at the same time a couple hallways away and i pulled him up when he couldn't get himself up and lost some time up there but we made it anyway"

its silent for a bit

"so...basically he's out because of you?"

i think about it

"well, sorta, we could've gotten recaptured a couple times, especially me but he saved me so we're kind of even"

he blinks a few times, it makes me think of tyler and i get a bit sad again

"shouldn't he eat?" i whisper

"he'd say the same about you" josh says

i sigh and rub my eyes "im gonna head to bed" i say and get up "just give him my plate"