White Rabbit | Scaramouche x reader

☾ Before the Goodbye

TW: grief/death/murder are present in this chapter. please read with caution if you are sensitive to such themes.

  ↳ ❦ Location: Changsheng Hospital

BEEP

BEEP

BEEP

The sounds of your mother's heart monitor were rather haunting. You sat on a chair next to the window, your arms crossed while you stared at the image of your mother. She was lying on her back, her face covered with a mask while various IVs were hooked to bags near the bed. Her heartbeat was severely slow, the sounds of the beeps haunting you. Her eyes were shut, not showing any signs of opening any time soon.

"I'm sorry, y/n. It seems that the fentanyl she ingested was in too high of a dosage. We've given her naloxone, which restored her breathing a little. Unfortunately, her body isn't handling the opiate well, so I suspect it won't be long until the rest of her body shuts down," Dr. Baizhu explained, his eyes looking sorrowful at you. He knew who you were, which only made him feel more sad for you, given you just went through the loss of an ex-lover.

"I will send a nurse to make arrangements for you. We will give you a pamphlet for our partnering company, Wangshen Funeral Parlor. Again, I am deeply sorry. If there is anything you need at all, please do not hesitate to reach out to our staff," Dr. Baizhu stated, bowing respectfully before leaving the room. He wanted to give you time to mourn alone.

Everything felt so unreal. The sight of her graying skin. The slow beeps of her heart monitor. The shallow, pitiful breaths she was taking. All of it. Every bit of this scenario seemed to be fake. There was no way this was happening. Surely your mother wouldn't overdose on such a drug. You didn't strike her as a type to do drugs, given your father died from an overdose. Then again, maybe she was the type. Maybe this was why she was so adamant about you getting money soon - to fuel her addiction.

An upset chuckle escaped your lips, tears starting to form in your eyes. Your throat burned, an attempt to not cry while you spoke, but nonetheless, you lost the fight. "I can't believe you."

Naturally, your words were met with nothing. Your mother couldn't speak. Her body was slowly dying in front of you, so words would never be exchanged between the two of you. Would you even want to talk to her now? Would this be a situation in which you'd want to hear your mother's words? For the past month, you've pushed her away and remained silent. Now you were faced with her own form of silence.

"You didn't actually kill yourself, right? You're too prideful to do such a thing, you know," you muttered, your voice filled with anger and hurt. Tears started to shed, the droplets running down your cheeks while you stared at the motionless body of your mother. "Why would you ever put me in such a situation?"

You hated thinking that your mother took her own life. She was a prideful, snobby woman. There was no way someone like her would actually take her life. She was so invested in money, power, and fame. She couldn't have those assets if she were dead. Something felt so off about this situation. For now, you were focused on saying your peace before the heart monitor turned off.

"For years I've been your little fucking puppet. I've done everything you've asked me to do, even putting myself in harmful situations you weren't even there to defend me. It's not like you would have anyway. Your money and fame were much more important to you than my own safety or happiness," you stated with a hurt smile on your face, watery eyes staring at your mother. Could she hear you? Was she able to understand you? Was she even conscious?