hi
it's been a while :)
like no really, matagal na ako hindi nakakapagsulat dito and i was really busy for the past few months kasi preparing na ako for graduation.
yes po, I graduated in junior high :D
currently, bakasyon na so I took the time of this night for me to write my thoughts about life lately.
let's start about a few months earlier.
first day ng grade 10: sobrang kabado ako but I was relaxed since kaklase ko ang mga naging kaklase ko last school year. so I didn't have to force myself to socialize and those stuff. It's really hard to make a solid friend like I had right now.
but so I was like... I had to do this. I need to finish this. I even wrote to my diary na I wished to graduate with High Honors. let's see if kaya ko :)
2024 MARCH-APRIL: i got scared. natakot ako kasi nagkaroon ng misunderstanding sa amin ng isa kong close best friend and I really thought na hanggang dun na yung friendship namin. na akala ko, gra-graduate ako na hindi ko siya bati. it was a scary thought but if I looked back, I think she'll be fine with that. as long as she's fine, I'll move on.
it was a struggle for me sobra kasi I cannot focus much sa studies ko. so I just wished her well and just... moved on, leaving me confuse with what kind of conflict we had.
ito rin yung time na as long as possible ay sinusulit ko ang school day ko. kasi I would never had the chance to go back in time to experience the day again.
i would surely miss them. they are the best I could ever had.
2024 MAY- a few days more to go para makapag-graduate na ako.
ito yung month na okay na kami ni friend. nag hang-out kasi kami na magkakaibigan (4 kami) and we were not awkward with each other anymore lol. andun pa rin yung unspoken tension pero I'm just glad na okay na kami.
that hang out was the best. it made me realize of couple of things. like they were the person that made my life feels like I'm truly alive and enjoying life. gets nyo? hahaha bast ganun. I'm glad to be alive and I'm glad to be friends with these people. I'm grateful for them.
graduation: it's the day we've all been waiting for. and it's the day I'll be letting go of all of these.
it was a bittersweet moment for me. kasi after 2 years na magkakasama, maghihiwalay na kami. nakakalungkot kasi, my classmates made my school life way enjoyable. despite sa mga nakakairita moments, I'm glad na classmates ko sila. And I'm glad na sila ang kasama ko grumaduate.
I even prepared gifts to my three classmates who are my closest friends. Plus, my best online friend hahaha. I want to know that I appreciate them more than they thought. I want to make them feel loved and feel special because they're truly one amazing person who made me the person I wanted to be.
I wrote them long letters, confessing my love for them lol. It was like my appreciation letter to them because I really do appreciate them :D
I do love them. And I'm now afraid of the world without them.
Aside letters, I also gifted them a small totoro plushie. I kinda felt that my words of affirmation wasn't enough so I wanted to gift them a different physical gift hahaha. I'm happy that they received it. I really hope they treasure it ;)
and so yun. I graduated. Even though I wish I would walk up to the stage hearing my name and then the word "High Honor", I didn't get the chance to.
I got a Honor Award and a Conduct Award :)
I did not get dissapointed that much kasi alam ko naman kung ano lang nakaya ko ay yun na ang icecelebrate ko. I don't need that High Honor title next to my name. The experience of High School is already an honor to me. I'm glad I had fun. I'm glad I liked school. I'm glad I had friends like them.
Thank you for everything!
2024 JUNE: bakasyon na. so everyday na iniisip ko ay... what strand should I choose? i had multiple conversation about this and I just can't make up my mind. I really can't. I can't decide.
I'm interested sa Nursing pero I don't want a low salary so now I'm thinking of taking Educ as well. Maybe in Mathematics or Biology/Science.
Hindi ko talaga alam. STEM or HUMMS. it doesn't matter kung saan, mahihirapan pa rin ako. pero... hah i just don't know what is what in my life. I'm too afraid na sumabak in adult life. I don't want to grow up just yet.
Malapit na ang enrollment and in less than ten days ay need ko na ng final decision.
Whatever it is, you're gonna do well. Lyra, don't worry too much. You got you. And you can do it. Just have fate in yourself. Believe that you can do it. I love you. Don't stress too much, okay? I love you. >v<
June 21, 2024
YOU ARE READING
My book
Randomcreated a new one since I couldn't have access to my old one :) a letter to my future self: don't be stupid started: december 4, 2021- Saturday