Always Running (MATURE CONTENT)

CHAPTER 31

RUNNING. Nessa wasn't sure if she was running from Lucas or running from the feelings she so desperately did not want to have. She wasn't sure if she wanted to go back to a man that had sought out the woman he used to sleep with over the woman he was living with and making love to. Why had Lucas gone to Reagan instead of going home? It didn't matter anymore. She had to leave. She had to run.

Ryder drove through town and looked back at Nessa. All their phones had been turned off, so Lucas couldn't trace them. They were in a sense all on the run from Lucas now.

"We need a plan Nessa. We can't just drive around. Lucas will find you in no time that way."

"First we need to switch cars. No doubt Lucas has called his state police buddy and put him on the lookout for this car." Nessa was a seasoned runner and knew what to do.

"We can stop at my house and get my truck," Blake suggested.

Nessa nodded her head yes. "Good, then we need to get a burner phone and I need you to send Lilian a message that we are fine and that we are going to spend a few days at the beach, so I can clear my head," she told Ryder.

HURT. She was hurt, and Lucas had caused it. She couldn't get the image of Reagan in his shirt and him in his underwear out of her mind. What was she supposed to think? It didn't matter at that point if he had slept with her or not. He had left her alone, thinking that she had screwed up yet again while he was with Reagan instead of her. He had gone to Reagan in his hour of need and not her. That was what hurt her the most. Lucas had set her aside once again, he had dismissed her and gone to another woman.

ANGRY. She was angry that Lucas had dismissed her so easily yet again after he had promised that he would not do it. She was angry that her past was always in the back burner ready to jump out at her and scald her every time it wanted to.

EASY. She was not an easy person to live with and she knew that. She had warned Lucas over and over again, yet he had taken her as she was. He had assured her that it didn't matter how hard things got he would always be there and he wasn't. The first chance he got he ran to Reagan.

Nessa started to think that perhaps what she felt was somewhat what Lucas had felt every time she ran away from him. She shook her head no. It was completely different. She had not run to another man like Lucas had run to another woman. She had run for good reasons and for her own safety. It wasn't the same thing at all.

SAFETY. It was time that Nessa found her own safety. Yes. Lucas had kept her somewhat safe, but she needed to keep herself safe. She was not going to depend on anyone else to keep her safe because that way she would never truly be safe. She had to give herself her own safety.

After switching cars, Nessa sat in the back seat with Maggie. They were all quiet and every one of them wanted to speak. Nessa was sure of it.

"Spill it before you all drive me crazy," Nessa said. "I can hear you brains from back here."

Blake chuckled. He was the first one to break the silence. "I won't assume I know the dynamics of your relationship with Lucas however, I do know the man is crazy in love with you."

"You can't actually be serious," Maggie interjected. "Nessa walked in on the man in his boxers and the woman was wearing his shirt, his fucking shirt."

Nessa saw how upset Maggie was and she smiled. It felt good to know that she wasn't overreacting.

"Yes, he fucked up, but I don't think he fucked that woman. Lucas wouldn't do something like that." Ryder tried to remain neutral, though it was hard. He felt bad for Nessa. She had enough shit to deal with to add more to her plate.