Always Running (MATURE CONTENT)

CHAPTER 8

SLEEP. Her first night in Lucas' house was like any other night anywhere else. She did not sleep very well. She checked the windows various times throughout the night making sure they were locked. She checked the bathroom window and door several times as well. She slept with her clothes and shoes on like she normally did and laid a blanket down on the white and violet colored bed spread so she wouldn't stain it or get it dirty.

DOUBT. She had been riddled with doubt the whole night making it impossible to sleep longer than twenty minutes at a time. She wanted so much to believe that Lucas did have the best intentions when it came to her, however she couldn't, not after what she had survived with Justin. He had ruined it for any other man that might have come into her life. He was still controlling her in a way and that made her so angry she could spit fire.

Determined to turn a new leaf in her life she sat up and began to pace, it always helped her to think. She had to make changes. Life was giving her a second chance. Why? Well that was a question she never asked, and she wasn't about to start now. There was only one solution to the trust problem she was currently having with Lucas, she would have to let him in little by little to see where things went. He seemed like a nice man, an honorable man. Nothing is as it seems! Nothing! her inner voice screamed out again.

"Shut up!" she hissed. She was so tired of going through life looking over her shoulder. She was so tired of being afraid, she was even more tired of not resting properly. At that rate, she would reach thirty looking like she was fifty.

A soft knock at the door made her jump. "Who is it?" She backed up out of habit again and frowned groaning at herself.

"Lucas," he said, keeping his voice soft.

"Come in."

"The door is locked, Nessa."

She rushed to unlock the door and moved back as she opened it. Lucas stood there wearing nothing but black sweatpants and a grey T-shirt that hugged him like a second skin showing off his chiseled muscles. Nessa's mouth began to water just looking at him.

"Can I come in?"

She nodded her head yes and waited for him to be inside before closing the door and locking it again out of habit, which did not go unnoticed by him.

"I heard you walking about, can't sleep?"

She shook her head no. "Sorry, I didn't think I was walking so loud."

Lucas noticed that she was still fully dressed. "You weren't, my room is connected to yours, so the noise carries through."

So, that was what that other door was for, she thought.

"Would you like to drink something? Maybe it would help you sleep?" he said, not moving, not wanting to make her more nervous.

An idea popped into her head and she mulled it over while she looked at him. For some reason, he made her somewhat comfortable and he definitely made her feel emotions she hadn't felt in a very long time which was extra points for him there too.

"At the risk of sounding nutty, I was thinking while I paced."

"Oh?" He sat at the foot of the bed and waited for her to go on.

She hummed and nodded her head up and down. "I was actually going to talk to you about it tomorrow. Since I have you here now I can talk to you now." She began to pace again. "I tend to over think everything, and you know why. It's kind of hard not to try and find the bad in everything that happens to me so that's what I've been doing, trying to find the bad but I'm having trouble with it."