Mazzaroth - The Only Thing I Have Left Of You

21st October, 1988

The anti-justice really thinks he is in some kind of game, where there is a knock and answer, without realising that the intensity of the latter, because I don't back down if he wants to cross the line.

He came into my room on the morning of the 16th. He let me know himself and I'm sure you're wondering why and why he didn't keep it a secret. Unfortunately, I think I know the answer.

'Unfortunately', although it's not entirely negative, but it is bad enough, because it means that I have come into contact with L so much that I can understand him or, rather, hypothesise and have a high percentage of probability of being accurate in listing some of the motivations that guide his actions, besides that of annoying me and believing that all this is hilarious.

I will briefly discuss the technical aspect, which is the fact that the cap he took possession of like a kleptomaniac served to cover his new haircut.

He is bald and doesn't seem to like it at all – rightly so, since it doesn't suit him as well as it suited me. This is not my subjective opinion, but it is objectively true, as Ayla merely tells him that it will grow out quickly, rather than letting him know, as she did with me, that it looks nice whenever she gets the chance.

L does not react to her encouragement, except with an annoyed expression, probably because she is the main culprit. She stepped in during his haircut, when the hairdresser walked away for a moment. I don't think L had noticed what Ayla was up to until he heard the razor being turned on and, a second later, a certain breeze touching a spot on his head that hadn't seen the light of day for probably years.

The only downside of this issue is that it didn't destroy the relation Ayla and L have, because my best friend made it up to him, even though she shouldn't have, as I don't think she did anything wrong.

In any case, since he didn't want to have his head exposed to the public of Wammy's House, as well as staying in the room longer, with the occasional visits from Natal and Elioenai, he decided that the best solution was to steal and vandalise other people's objects, because not only did he take my cap, but he also used a permanent marker to draw over the 'E', which is just above the Velcro strap, so that it looked like an 'L'.

I didn't get so angry, although I had the right to be, but I didn't care that much about that letter. I thought it was the initial of his code name, but then I saw it in a book and realised that it starts with the letter 'A'. Since then, I used the 'E' as an identifier to know that it was my cap, even though the other residents do not have one in the same dark blue colour.

I preferred to channel that feeling into a plan to make L a problem in Watari's eyes. It failed – although the conversation itself was positive from my point of view, because I wasn't grounded for destroying L's floppy disk and Watari told me he was proud of me.

I should have expected that, because L wouldn't have let me go if it had actually affected him, not to mention that his very choice to be transparent should have indicated to me that it would be pointless.

If I had found out about it myself, secretly, without the cap being ruined, I would have had to find confirmation that he had used it, so that my complaint would have had solid evidence to support it. It was going to be a long task and L did not want to waste time.

By telling me, and having a witness in my favour – Ayla – as well as his own initial on the back of the cap, I could head straight to the owner, expose everything, and, in this way, learn that Watari is aware of everything I have done and am going to do.

In a nutshell, it doesn't matter what L decides to do in response to my behaviour, because he likes to snitch and, by telling Watari everything, he has a justification to act in a way and I can no longer turn to the owner, expecting him to indulge me, as I'm sure L will try not to exceed the level of severity of my actions in Watari's eyes, otherwise he will end up in the wrong.