He couldn't find slumber.
He couldn't just close his eyes and not imagine the sounds and sights.
The feeling.
Lukas laid in bed all night under his blanket staring at the blackness, praying to just forget as his head pounded from having drank more than he wanted to.
A knock comes to his door- and he can only assume it's morning.
But he doesn't rouse.
He doesn't remove the covers.
When the bed sips beside him, he remains as still as possible- praying whomever has come to visit him will simply leave and forget he ever existed.
"Are you asleep or just pretending?"
Max.
A shiver runs through his body.
He never expected a moment like this with a man who secretly claims him as his own.
A man he blatantly has disrespected several times and still that very man accepts him lovingly.
Pulling back the covers just to reveal his eyes, he finds Max sitting on the edge of his bed- holding a plate of toast, applesauce, and a cup of what smells like coffee.
"How pissed is she?" Lukas meekly asks as he slowly sits up.
"She's not pissed at you— that's for sure. She's upstairs assisting your brother. Poor kid is sicker than a dog."
"I feel horrid. Poor kid should've never been there. I never should've been there- I'm so stupid..."
"It's not your fault. And you're not stupid- by any means. So don't ever say that." Max says and sets the plate and drink on the bedside table. "How's your um...ya know—bits?"
"Cut up...it was bleeding when I took a shower."
"Eee...I'm really sorry. I have gauze. I might work better than bandaids." Max says trying to make light of the shitty situation.
"I cleans them out pretty well."
"Should maybe put some Neosporin on it too—just incase." Max winces and Lukas just lets his head droop.
"I don't know what's wrong with me..." He starts crying and Max sits beside him and pulls him into his arms.
"Nothing is wrong with you. I don't understand why you think that."
"How couldn't you!!?!" Lukas pulls from him, stands up out of bed and feels both anger and sadness rising in him. "You were telling me your teenage years and in comparison we are VASTLY different! I'm not into sex and wanking and I don't find anyone attractive!! I find the thought of touching myself let alone other people absolutely unnecessary and disgusting! So how is there not anything wrong with me?! How am I normal, Max?!"
Standing up, Max tries to go to him, but he can't bring himself to round the corner of the bed and invade Lukas' space.
"I don't want to have sex! I don't want to get erections and deal with the pain and problems it causes! I wake up and I hate my body! And no one could possibly understand that feeling! I HATE THIS FEELING INSIDE ME AMD I HATE WHAT HAPPENED TO ME LAST NIGHT!!!" Before Max can even say anything, Lukas storms passed him in his shorts and t-shirt and leaves his room- he passes his mother on the way out and leaves right out the front door without his shoes or his phone.
"What the bloody Hell was that about?" Helen asks confused as Max rushes past her and out the front door to chase down Lukas. "Bloody..."
"Muh...maaaaaaahhhh...." Logan calls as he begins to puke again into the upstairs toilet. Sighing heavily and runs her hands over her face wishing none of this was happening.
YOU ARE READING
Intertwined
Fanfic****Alternate Universe: New Amsterdam*** Helen Sharpe has been trying her best to simply keep her head above water. As a single mother of two teenage boys: she has to do all she can to not only keep them from burning their world down, but also find...
