Back Together ~ pt 2

❤︎︎ Seven ❤︎︎

We had a connecting flight in LA which made life worse. Lando woke me up when we landed in LA and I was pissed off. I was having a good sleep too. Worst part is that Lando thought the plane was leaving 5 minutes after our arrival but it actually was leaving 45 minutes after so we ran all the way there for no reason.

"you're telling me I had to fucking run for no reason" I said with literal rage built up inside me

"I'm sorry, baby. I didn't realise we had so much time. Let's just relax and enjoy the break before our flight takes off again. We've got a long week ahead of us, so let's not burn out too soon, okay?" He said. I was fucking fuming

"cunt..." I said under my breath

"Did you just call me a cunt, Lexi?"

"take a guess"

"I'm gonna go with yes"

"correct"

"Well, I'm not sure if I should be offended or amused. Maybe a little of both? But seriously, Lexi, don't let your frustration get the best of you"

"kinda hard not to when I already hate airports as it is an I've just ran for no fucking reason"

"I understand, love. And I'm sorry if I added to your stress. Let's just enjoy the rest of our break and then focus on getting through the flight together, okay?"

"I'm getting something to eat. probably sushi. can you just stay with our bags?"

"Of course. Can you get me a chicken wrap?"

"Fine. But only because I'm not gonna let you starve. love you, dickface" I said as I pecked his lips and I got us some food. He picked me up as I fell asleep next to him after eating our food and we finally flew to Bora Bora. I quite literally got into the hotel, stripped off and fell asleep. I was so tired. Lando being the pervert that he usually is meant that he got in bed next to me and held the covers up slightly so he could just look at my naked body. As I said: pervert.

I woke up the next morning and Lando had already chosen an outfit for me. A bright pink bikini and a black skirt with it. He knew me so well. We both had a shower and he actually let me shave his little beard with a deal that he would be able to shave my pussy. I mean I did need to shave but I think Lando was only offering because he just wanted to see my pussy. He's basically a horny sixteen year old boy. He put my hair up in dutch braids and I was gonna help sort out his hair when I noticed something. There was this one section of his hair which just went incredibly straight. Like straighter than ever. I tried to put some curl cream into it but it wouldn't curl.

The holiday was perfect. Every single day we went to the beach and cuddled up on the sand. I even went into the sea because it was constantly warm. Life just felt better. It was the break I needed before things were gonna go back to normal. Before things were gonna get worse

We went to the Dutch Grand Prix and then came straight back home after. A week after the Dutch GP. The day before our flight. His hair was getting straighter and straighter. He was losing his curls. Probably because he hadn't been looking after his curls properly. Thing is that I used his curls to calm my stress down in the same way he would use my hair. I would just play with each little ringlet on his head and my stress would just calm down but I couldn't do that.

"Don't worry about my hair, love. We'll figure something out. Besides, there are more important things in life than perfect curls" he said

"but I like your curls... I like playing with them like you like playing with my hair. it's why I kept it long" I said

"I know, love. And trust me, it's not that I don't appreciate your compliments. It's just that the curls aren't as important as you think they are"

"they are!!! they calm me down when I'm close to a panic attack which is basically every single day!!! you don't look like yourself without them..."

"Look, love, I understand how important my curls are to you. But please, try to understand that they're not the most important thing in the world"

"they are to me..."

"I know they are, love. And that's why I want to find a solution that makes both of us happy. But we can't let something as trivial as hair define our relationship. There are more important things in life, like love and trust and support"

"but they calm me down... you know I get emotional easily!!! I cry pretty much everyday for different reasons and most of those cries have been potential panic and anxiety attacks but playing with your curls have calmed me down..." I said with tears in my eyes

"I know, love. And I'm sorry if my words are coming across harshly. It's just that I don't want you to rely on something as temporary as hair to feel better. There are other ways we can help each other through those tough times" he said

"Not for me..." I said with my leg shaking. He put his hand on my leg and rubbed it to try and calm me down

"Love, I'm here for you. And I promise to do whatever I can to make you feel better, whether it's through my hair or something else" he said. I just couldn't do it. I ran to the bathroom and locked the door. I was literally going insane. It wasn't just because of his hair though. I had been receiving death threats too from his fans and it was driving me crazy. 3 hours passed and I hadn't come out. I even managed to smash our bathroom mirror. I was rocking on the floor in a ball. I had a red nose and red eyes and I had trashed the whole bathroom. He managed to unlock the door and he saw me on the floor. "Love, what happened? Are you okay?" He said. I just kept rocking on the floor. I was staring into space. "Love, you're scaring me. Please say something. Anything" he said. I just kept staring into space. I looked at him but I couldn't speak. I was scratching my arm until it was bleeding. "Lexi, please stop! You're hurting yourself. I know it's hard but you have to try and talk to me. I want to help you" he said as he pulled my arm away. He picked me up and put me on the bed and tucked me up. I couldn't speak and I felt like shit. I refused to eat for the next 5 hours. I just didn't want to do anything. "What's wrong, baby? Please talk to me. I'm here for you" he said as he got in bed and cuddled up to me

"nothing..."

"I love you, and I'm not going anywhere. You can tell me anything, love"

"it's nothing... I just feel like shit..."

"I know, love. But you're not alone in feeling that way. Let's work on finding ways to manage your anxiety and depression together, okay?"

"there is no way"

"We'll find a way, love. I promise" he said